thebetweenspace's posted comments

  1. On Nightmares:

    posted about 3 hours ago

    Sadly, we are often charged by the negative energy certain people impose upon us. But seriously, Jack may have a bad dad, but that doesn’t mean he has to treat the rest of us the same way. What a jerk!

  2. On The Androgynous Prince:

    posted about 3 hours ago

    We have got to get Charlie Murphy into this series, somehow. Dave Chapelle was a freaking genius (until the demands of corporate America did him in)!

  3. On The Policy of Truth:

    posted about 4 hours ago

    Sequel-mail has arrived!

  4. On Just When I Need Him:

    posted about 4 hours ago

    Stop lying, girl. Jack will kill you, if you don’t get someone one him. And I like the awkward sentence for Trey and how it was noted in the narration.

  5. On Lying :

    posted about 4 hours ago

    A terribly unnecessary, but almost understandable lie. Why do we lie to cover up the terrible deeds of certain people in our lives? It always ends up hurting us the most.

  6. On Emotions:

    posted about 4 hours ago

    I think the 3rd paragraph is missing an is.

    The thing with Jack is part of me wants to try to see things his way. That part of me wants to see that he, in one way or another, has gotten screwed over. That she has done something, without realizing her fault, to aid this screwing over.

    But ultimately, I haven’t figured his intentions out either. He’s a real mystery.

  7. On LoA Saves the Planet! (2075 challenge):

    posted about 4 hours ago

    Get crazy with your hippy self. Just kidding. I love this approach to the challenge. So much more peaceful than your alter-ego that’s assassinating everybody on the site!

  8. On The Policy of Truth:

    posted about 4 hours ago

    The comical body posture of the waitress trying to balance her tray was a very nice touch. The lipstick stain on her teeth, another. But, the ‘I’ll be out of the country for the next month’ message… Poor Jameson.

  9. On Dr Who Is cuckolded By Neil Diamond.:

    posted about 4 hours ago

    You got sequel!

  10. On Prandi's Plan:

    posted about 5 hours ago

    Cheer up, Bartimaeus, a cheerful sequel is here! ;)

  11. On Prandi's Plan:

    posted about 6 hours ago

    That last line is a real jaw-dropper! But the setup line is what made it work so perfectly: Then she saw Becca and Jameson at the entrance to Chili’s, hugging. As if last night had never happened. As if Prandi didn’t exist. Masterful.

  12. On Show It To Me:

    posted about 6 hours ago

    Well, I_ don’t refer to my member as a _bobcat but for some reason our hero does.

  13. On Dr Who Is cuckolded By Neil Diamond.:

    posted about 6 hours ago

    I can’t stop laughing. Where to begin… The saying that to assume ‘makes an ass out of you and me’ was a nice touch. The entire Neil Diamond thing worked very well. And I love father time casted as a cock-blocker. But the best part was easily Skyler saying, “Why is Lisa walking like a gunfighter?”

  14. On Sudden Impulse:

    posted about 7 hours ago

    Check your sequel-mail. I assure you there’s something new!

  15. On Sudden Impulse:

    posted about 8 hours ago

    I loved the detail that she was still in her pajamas (funny how I just sort of sent her off into the woods without so much as a decent outfit). Time to see who the mysterious watcher is.

  16. On "Tell Me I Am Beautiful":

    posted about 8 hours ago

    Another very real sequel that works on its own but also describes a secondary character and the effects of the event. Terrific final line, for a second I thought the priest was gonna get some.

  17. On Peripheral Evil Part 15 (An Evening in Hades):

    posted about 9 hours ago

    Wow, chaos is the word of the day. Very cool scene.

  18. On DO NOT READ THIS!!!!!:

    posted about 9 hours ago

    Great job on setting up what figures to be an exciting epic story! @ John Perkins, the same thing flashed into my mind when I read this.

  19. On I'd Give My Right Arm To Be Normal:

    posted about 9 hours ago

    Way to drop us right in the middle of a pickle. Even with just the context of this story, it seems apparent that losing the arm is the safest way to proceed.

  20. On As Good As Gold:

    posted about 9 hours ago

    You got sequel. Sadly Karl didn’t make the cut. Maybe next time?

  21. On Batten down the hatches:

    posted about 9 hours ago

    Wow, either this go is overly dramatic or this hostage situation is even bigger than I imagined it to be. Great sequel!

  22. On As Good As Gold:

    posted about 11 hours ago

    I know just where to take this. ;) I love that Sassy called herself a git. She seems to be growing as a person in some areas, i.e. thinking of others first. And not so much in other areas, i.e. all the manipulation she sinks to even now. (Sidebar: I love that Krulltar is commenting like a caveman today. And I imagine we’ll see Karl sometime in the future).

  23. On Scout's Honor:

    posted about 11 hours ago

    I love the dialogue, especially the portion about Scout’s honor. I wonder how Sassy’s gonna react. BTW, have you been experiencing a major lag today on ficlets or is it just my computer?

  24. On Zombie Resistance:

    posted about 11 hours ago

    “It’s an ice day to die, ain’t it, Red?” This guy is too much. I’m kinda glad the protagonist (forgot his name) isn’t sure about him.

  25. On Zombie Activism:

    posted about 11 hours ago

    No wonder, I like this series so much. Shaun of the Dead was hilarious too, but it doesn’t have Zombie Karl Marx (which bumps it down a notch).

  26. On The Top Story (Perfect Moment Ruined Challenge):

    posted about 14 hours ago

    If I used the right formula, John, I think I might be able to translate your comment into a really funny sequel.

  27. On Zombie Capitalism:

    posted about 14 hours ago

    “Die, Commie bastard!” raged the man, who was distinctly not a Zombie Karl Marx, but at this moment was just as dangerous.

    What a great line. I’m glad you’ve returned to this series. Now, if we could just get you to finish that Princess Bride series…

  28. On Why Wouldn't She Love Me?:

    posted about 15 hours ago

    Ouch, that’s why I married a sane woman. I learned long ago not to mess with crazy. The transition is a bit abrupt, but the ending is very fitting.

  29. On Help Arrives:

    posted about 15 hours ago

    My only question is whether or not Steve survived the crash. It’d be a shame to lose such a character as that one.

  30. On The Aftermath:

    posted about 15 hours ago

    Well, I guess nobody is all bad. A note of redemption for Susan being a hero and staying with her love. THX is right there is a great depth to these characters.

  31. On Trouble at the Controls:

    posted about 15 hours ago

    I know it’s never right for a guy to punch a girl, but drunk or not Susan is just asking for it. Talk about taking a bad situation to new levels with her crazy obsession.

  32. On Landing Downwind:

    posted about 15 hours ago

    This spells trouble. I love the onlookers take on the situation and how his inexperience almost demands disaster.

  33. On Gonna Die:

    posted about 15 hours ago

    If I was Kate and I survived the plane crash, I would never talk to Susan again. She’s a complete nutcase.

  34. On Landing Would Be Good:

    posted about 15 hours ago

    I agree, that last line was absolutely inspired.

  35. On Landing Would Be Good:

    posted about 15 hours ago

    I agree, that last line was absolutely inspired.

  36. On You Shot Me:

    posted about 15 hours ago

    What an absolute insane asylum you’ve created. Susan is out of her mind, Kate is angry and poor Steve has such a reputation as a goof that nobody’d ever believe his story anyway.

  37. On I Knew I Was Going to Kill You :

    posted about 15 hours ago

    First of all, I love that he reports it as a highjacking instead of an emergency. Second, she’s one crazy drunk.

  38. On Don't Know How to Fly:

    posted about 15 hours ago

    Not knowing how to fly, definitely fits his character. He’s a real quirky son of a gun.

  39. On Around the Pattern:

    posted about 15 hours ago

    From bad to completely disastrous. I can’t say I saw that coming, but I knew something foul was going to happen sooner or later. The sense of impending doom was too much to ignore.

  40. On Not So Fast:

    posted about 15 hours ago

    Yeah, he’s back to trying to get some. I love this guy. He’s a hoot.

  41. On Greenlee and the Gun:

    posted about 15 hours ago

    Wow, I was expecting the other girl to pull something, not poor, drunken Susan. And he sure turned from smarmy to complete a-hole in a hurry.

  42. On Airborn:

    posted about 15 hours ago

    I sense an air duel between Steve and Kate coming up and probably a crash at some point.

  43. On Take Off:

    posted about 15 hours ago

    I love how Steve is oblivious to the fact that the girls are not interested in him. The detail THX mentioned was a subtle way of developing their history. Well done.

  44. On Buckle Up, Ladies:

    posted about 15 hours ago

    Steve is a real character and Kate seems to be a different kind of trouble. Great setup so far.

  45. On Experimental Ficlet Number 33:

    posted about 16 hours ago

    I’m just glad I could be of service to you. Well done, if I do say so myself.

  46. On Stiff:

    posted about 16 hours ago

    That was awesome. Great sequel, talk about being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

  47. On Morning:

    posted about 16 hours ago

    I love the ending. Really great setup. Really makes you wonder exactly what happened.

  48. On Experimental Ficlet Number 30:

    posted about 16 hours ago

    I’m quite a bit confused by Blusparrow’s comment.

  49. On Experimental Ficlet Number 32:

    posted about 16 hours ago

    Who are they? And what have they done to her?

  50. On Experimental Ficlet Number 31:

    posted about 16 hours ago

    Ooh, now there is a mysterious they in the picture.

  51. On Experimental Ficlet Number 30:

    posted about 17 hours ago

    Well done with the line and the nod to The Princess Bride.

  52. On Anna Cristina's New Pic The Poem.:

    posted about 18 hours ago

    With John, I’m completely dumbfounded that you actually posted this, but I couldn’t help but laugh throughout. When her hair becomes sexy and almost Jewish? Something else, my friend. You are something else. LOL.

  53. On The Sexy Mistress Elsha Claims a Gorf.:

    posted about 18 hours ago

    “I’d bet my foreskin on it.” “Aren’t you a jew?” Absolutely hilarious, though I am a bit disappointed the Mistress took out Kermitgorf. I was hoping he would have more than a bit role in all that’s to happen.

  54. On Mistress Elsha the sexy assassin.:

    posted about 18 hours ago

    Your mind is definitely a trip. This is hilarious and much easier to follow than the original. I love the idea of pitting ficleteers against one another. The part about Dr. Tim living like a rock star was quite hilarious to picture.

  55. On Revenge:

    posted 1 day ago

    Okay, no, this guy is a complete freak of nature. I think the steroids have gone to his head. I just hope Kit doesn’t develop Stockholm Syndrome.

  56. On Good Morning:

    posted 1 day ago

    It was a dream.

    “Why don’t you come on in the back and get yourself something free?” ? Sheryl isn’t operating a whorehouse is she? Just kidding. On a side note, it does look like your italics markers are somehow off…

  57. On To The Age Of The Fonz.(But first let me stop by 1998 and pickup some primo thai stick):

    posted 1 day ago

    Hilarious! It’s like the H. G. Wells’ version of Groundhog Day. I think it’s officially time for the series to venture away from attempted sexual conquests. Maybe there’s something else we can do with that blasted time machine.

  58. On The Insane Knight: Answers :

    posted 1 day ago

    And then he realizes there are no more sequels and cries alone on his couch.

  59. On The Insane Knight: Answers :

    posted 1 day ago

    Quite the interesting plot explaining sequel. Very interesting indeed.

  60. On Tlod and Horse Put Out A Fire:

    posted 1 day ago

    Another great use for dragon urine, right here. Read all about it!

  61. On The Sane Knight Goes Insane (Again):

    posted 1 day ago

    I love the list of things the once-again Insane Knight asks, especially the question about Ted’s grooming habits. You look and smell horrible. LOL.

  62. On Montelban the Poodle:

    posted 1 day ago

    I just have to know did you plan on turning Montelban into a poodle when you first named him or did that develop later?

  63. On Tlod and Horse Find a Tower:

    posted 1 day ago

    Horse is a very reasonable dragon, if not lazy.

  64. On The Insane Knight Goes Sane:

    posted 1 day ago

    I wasn’t done talking to him… and I don’t speak dog. Another brilliant line for the insane knight, who is now sane. That was a mouth-full.

  65. On A Horse and his Dwarf:

    posted 1 day ago

    Exactly. Dragons that are converted to horses by insane knights need their sleep. I love that they agree on revenge. Did I mention how incredibly funny this series is?

  66. On The Insane Knight Imprisoned:

    posted 1 day ago

    Ted the Off-White is probably only off-white because he never washes his robes. Gross. Why am I just discovering this treasure trove of a series, and subsequently flooding your in-box with comments, now?

  67. On The Insane Knight in the Afterlife:

    posted 1 day ago

    Very interesting. I wonder what Montelban is doing in the afterlife.

  68. On The Insane Knight Dies a Fiery Death:

    posted 1 day ago

    Well, that’s a new development, the talking dragon, Horse. I hope the Insane Knight finds some sort of resurrection.

  69. On The Insane Knight Gets Lost:

    posted 1 day ago

    I love the things that the Insane Knight considers to be insane, like elemental fires. And that imaginary sword is getting plenty of use. I wonder if he’s conjured the elemental fire himself or if Ted the Off-White did.

  70. On The Insane Knight Gets Lost:

    posted 1 day ago

    I love the things that the Insane Knight considers to be insane, like elemental fires. And that imaginary sword is getting plenty of use. I wonder if he’s conjured the elemental fire himself or if Ted the Off-White did.

  71. On The Insane Knight Pillages a Village part 8:

    posted 1 day ago

    I agree with Alexa, you should have more loyal followers. This series is sheer comedic brilliance. I feel kinda bad for Ted the Off-White, though.

  72. On The Insane Knight Pillages a Village part 7:

    posted 1 day ago

    Yeah, I don’t know if I trust Montelban anymore. Tlod made a pretty good point about the beard. And his hasty exit while hilarious casts doubt into my mind about his sincerity.

  73. On The Insane Knight Pillages a Village part 7:

    posted 1 day ago

    Yeah, I don’t know if I trust Montelban anymore. Tlod made a pretty good point about the beard. And his hasty exit while hilarious casts doubt into my mind about his sincerity.

  74. On The Insane Knight Pillages a Village part 6:

    posted 1 day ago

    “Madam,” he said, “you have a staring problem.” That’s absolutely hilarious! This guy is just too much.

  75. On The Insane Knight Pillages a Village part 5:

    posted 1 day ago

    I love that last bit of dialogue. It gives the series a whole new real background to go with all the hilarity.

  76. On The Insane Knight Pillages a Village part 4:

    posted 1 day ago

    He’s completely unhinged, which makes it impossible not to watch his interactions. I wonder if the Medusa will fall for his imaginary sword trick.

  77. On The Insane Knight Pillages a Village part 3:

    posted 1 day ago

    Thank you Medusa, you’ve been very helpful. Fantastic line!

  78. On The Insane Knight Pillages a Village part 2:

    posted 1 day ago

    That is hysterical. I loved the Medusa argument, but I was already laughing by then at how Tlod got pushed aside by anxious shoppers.

  79. On The Insane Knight Pillages a Village part 1:

    posted 1 day ago

    I’m gonna make it a personal goal to comment on every story you’ve written until you start writing some more… and then I’ll comment on those. Absolute brilliance.

  80. On The Insane Knight Finds Some Clothes:

    posted 1 day ago

    “Tis a horse, you Alcoholic!” I love how he corrects the other guy, but of course is actually wrong, since he’s insane and all.

  81. On The Insane Knight Finds a Horse:

    posted 1 day ago

    The Insane Knight is a phenomenal character. I love his line: I know a horse when I see one, Tlod. I couldn’t have defeated a dragon in battle.

  82. On The Insane Knight Finds a Head:

    posted 1 day ago

    I didn’t look at who wrote this before I read it. It was seamless… I loved the detail about the dragon being slain by the imaginary sword because he apparently believed in imaginary swords.

  83. On The Insane Knight Battles the Giants:

    posted 1 day ago

    Now what’s an insane knight without a sword? Oh well, I love how the burning Tlog shrugged.

  84. On The Insane Knight Takes a Break:

    posted 1 day ago

    I love the idea of a Papersmith repairing his paper mache armor. This night is truly insane.

  85. On The Insane Knight Raises the Dead:

    posted 1 day ago

    It was great from start to finish. I loved the line: Her eyes kept wandering from his demented, grinning face to his Paper Mache Armor, then back to the grin again. Very funny.

  86. On Mistress Elsha Always Gets Her Man.(Loa 2075 challenge.):

    posted 1 day ago

    That was hilarious and utterly chaotic. Strange enough, my favorite bit of writing on this page was: you are a type of twisted i can really get behind Krulltar. That cracked me up. And, yeah, it’s hilarious that you spent all that energy getting John Perkins canonized and now you kill him off. What a dirty shame.

  87. On Vignette: Theatre:

    posted 1 day ago

    I really like this as well. My favorite part is probably the beginning with the repetition of old and the dream of the young man. Glad his dream could live on in the hearts of the townspeople after he sold out. ;)

  88. On Right or Wrong:

    posted 1 day ago

    I really like the raw emotion in the second-to-last paragraph and her attempt to understand why Jack’s after her. Maybe there’s a heart in there somewhere, or maybe he’s a complete creep. Either way, his tactics seem to have demoralized her.

  89. On Right or Wrong:

    posted 1 day ago

    I really like the raw emotion in the second-to-last paragraph and her attempt to understand why Jack’s after her. Maybe there’s a heart in there somewhere, or maybe he’s a complete creep. Either way, his tactics seem to have demoralized her.

  90. On Right or Wrong:

    posted 1 day ago

    I really like the raw emotion in the second-to-last paragraph and her attempt to understand why Jack’s after her. Maybe there’s a heart in there somewhere, or maybe he’s a complete creep. Either way, his tactics seem to have demoralized her.

  91. On Change:

    posted 1 day ago

    Man, I hope she tells him the truth soon. Running off like that makes her look guilty, even if she’s just scared of the brooding psycho who keeps accosting her. I like the resolve she has at the end.

  92. On Poor Dancing Robot:

    posted 1 day ago

    It is really cool how you gave the robot such spirit and personality that I’m sitting her rooting for it. Well done!

  93. On Ghost in the Machine:

    posted 1 day ago

    I like the increasingly complexity of thought, a kind of rapidly evolving robotic intelligence. Very cool.

  94. On Bobcat Escaped from Book:

    posted 1 day ago

    Yeah, that guy’s dialogue really stands out. Nicely done!

  95. On The Marty McFly Factor:

    posted 1 day ago

    Sequel away, if you get the inspiration… And that goes for all of you.

  96. On Constant Creature:

    posted 1 day ago

    You have sequel!

  97. On May 7, 2008: One Last Jump:

    posted 1 day ago

    I didn’t realize Mercedes was a Spanish name. That clears it up. Once again, great dialogue and I loved how the scene played out.

  98. On May 7, 2008: One Last Jump:

    posted 1 day ago

    Masterful dialogue. What an interesting deathbed conversation. The only line that went over my head was the one about doing a Rosemary thingy.

  99. On Constant Creature:

    posted 1 day ago

    Awesomeness! Her rationalization is so reasonable. Poor Prandi, her thought process makes perfect sense, but she’s just torturing herself. There’s so much left to explore with these characters, my symbiotic friend, and I’m loving it! (sidebar: in the third paragraph knowing is missing an ‘i’).

  100. On The Following Ficlet Takes Place Between 10:00 PM and 11:00 PM:

    posted 1 day ago

    Okay, I jumped back into the fray. Let’s bring this thing to closure!

  101. On Peripheral Evil: Part 14 A Mother's Love Unleashed:

    posted 1 day ago

    Wow, that’s some crazy stuff. Bumps up the intrigue level for sure. I wonder what the agreement is.

  102. On Peripheral Evil: Part 13 The Garden:

    posted 1 day ago

    Wow, that’s a deeply disturbing ending to this one. I don’t know quite where it fits in yet, but it’s excellent.

  103. On Happiness is... [LoA 2075+ Challenge]:

    posted 1 day ago

    Aw, this one is really sweet. I love how the great-granddaughter sounds out his screen name.

  104. On Experimental Ficlet No. 27:

    posted 1 day ago

    I agree, this is a great continuation, assuming you nix the ‘with’. Fun little series we have here.

  105. On Experimental Ficlet No. 29:

    posted 1 day ago

    Ooh, that’s a good one. It really flows well with the previous one.

  106. On The Truth or The Lies:

    posted 1 day ago

    Why would anyone believe Jack and why’s he stooping to lie. I hope Trey can see through him.

  107. On Not Yet:

    posted 1 day ago

    Jack really seems clueless when it comes to interacting with females. It would be one thing if he was kind of dangerous and mysteriously aloof or something, but he’s just this raging hulk. That character really freaks me out. Trey to the rescue!

  108. On Experimental Ficlet No. 28:

    posted 1 day ago

    I think you meant that I feel. This one is great, by the way.

  109. On Fifteen Years Later:

    posted 1 day ago

    Wow, that’s a hyper-realistic and depressing sequel. Wow, I guess being a derelict takes away your sensitivity. Then again, he is being practical. He’s got some holy clothes.

  110. On Pulmonary Orchestra:

    posted 1 day ago

    Great sequel. I wonder if something cataclysmic is going to happen to just these people in 13 days or the whole world? Very suspenseful indeed.

  111. On Dodgy Ticker:

    posted 1 day ago

    What a shocker of a last line! A countdown to what?

  112. On His Father:

    posted 1 day ago

    Wow, I’m surprised Trey’s father knows so much. It seemed like they were kind of estranged earlier in the series. And Jack is sure a creep showing up like that at the end.

  113. On How?:

    posted 1 day ago

    That’s dedication. To get fired from your job and then beg to stay on for volunteer hours. She must really want to avoid Jack.

  114. On Time Travel 101:

    posted 1 day ago

    I do believe someone has edited something since rule #3 is different than it was earlier. Either that or you time traveled. That’s probably more likely than an edit considering your plugging into an historical building and using net zero.

  115. On The Very Moment:

    posted 1 day ago

    @Traf, I love the idea of his use of time travel being a travesty to sexual darwinism. Maybe that theme can be explored in the series.

  116. On Time Travel 101:

    posted 1 day ago

    Too bad about rule #3. It kind of takes the fun out of time travel not being able to do any criminal activity. I like the idea that time sets its own rules. I’d say it’s about time for another time travel series!

  117. On My Own:

    posted 1 day ago

    Hmm… Everything is up in the air. I’m starting to doubt everybody’s intentions. Maybe Trey’s just out of town.

  118. On I Guess:

    posted 1 day ago

    Summer time love is an interesting tag for this entry, but come to think of it maybe they all have that tag. Funny way to try to convince her he’s the one for her, holding her down against her will like that. What a jerk.

  119. On Execution:

    posted 1 day ago

    Now that’s an awesome way to kill a guard. Definitely agree with the others, it’s truly awesome.

  120. On Experimental Ficlet No.26:

    posted 1 day ago

    Interesting, I wonder why she said thank you.

  121. On Damned if you do, and double damned if you don't:

    posted 2 days ago

    Odd, I could have sworn that I already commented on this story… I love the detail that their accomplices were found slaughtered like market pigs. Bring on the raveners!

  122. On The Raveners Are Coming! The Raveners Are Coming!:

    posted 2 days ago

    I love the last line. Something about the dark figures dropping just felt aesthetically proper.

  123. On Experimental Ficlet No.25:

    posted 2 days ago

    By the way, I hate it when I accidentally rate my own stuff. I’m so used to hitting the stars before my comment that I did it here! (Then you have to decide do I give it five stars or one star ‘cause it has to get something). I always err on the side of grace.

  124. On Experimental Ficlet No.25:

    posted 2 days ago

    You said it man.

  125. On The Following Ficlet Takes Place Between 10:00 PM and 11:00 PM:

    posted 2 days ago

    Something about this job unsettled Marcos. Not just because the kid was completely certifiable, but also because he didn’t know a thing about his employer, the Mastermind. Okay, you’ve got my attention. I’ll be back on this series like a baseball player on steroids.

  126. On Just Screwed:

    posted 2 days ago

    I really hope she escapes his clutches. This scenario is just messed up!

  127. On Peripheral Evil Part 12 (Return of the Dreadlocked Djinn ):

    posted 2 days ago

    Wow, what an awesomely bizarre moment. It was captivating in the very creepy way this series works. Interesting use of the biblical imagery.

  128. On Peripheral Evil Part 11(The Seeds of A Conspiracy):

    posted 2 days ago

    Someone smells a conspiracy theory. Are they the twins? Interesting segment ending with the charms. Hmm…

  129. On Peripheral Evil OVA Part One (Rewind Jim Jenkins):

    posted 2 days ago

    You worked macabre in, very nice. This is one of my favorite entries in the series. I love the ending.

  130. On Peripheral Evil OVA Part One (Rewind Jim Jenkins):

    posted 2 days ago

    You worked macabre in, very nice. This is one of my favorite entries in the series. I love the ending.

  131. On Peripheral Evil OVA Part One (Rewind Jim Jenkins):

    posted 2 days ago

    If you end up with like twelve duplicate comments from me, remember ‘Don’t hate the playa, hate the game.’ At the risk of possibly repeating myself, this is one of my favorite moments in the series so far. Nice flashback. I love how it ends.

  132. On Frozen:

    posted 2 days ago

    Why’s he need revenge on her? Oh, my, the PG-13-rated version of Jack wasn’t all that proper. I can’t imagine what the R-rated version will do. Does she carry pepper spray by chance?

  133. On Experimental Ficlet No.25:

    posted 2 days ago

    Not necessarily… There are plenty of other reasons she could have been screaming… Maybe he broke her heart. That’s for the next ficleter in the chain to decide, I guess.

  134. On The Low-Carb Kid vs. the Pasta Twins:

    posted 2 days ago

    Brilliant line: “We simply want you.” She crooned, her Italian accent warm and reminiscent of marinara. But my favorite part was his line at the end.

  135. On The Low Carb Kid vs. Yo' Momma:

    posted 2 days ago

    Hilarious, he defeated them with their own weapon, bad jokes.

  136. On The Low Carb Kid vs. Yo' Momma:

    posted 2 days ago

    Hilarious, he defeated them with their own weapon, bad jokes.

  137. On The Low-Carb Kid vs. Bread Baker:

    posted 2 days ago

    The Carrot Boomerang of Steel? I love how they all get drenched. Well done sequel.

  138. On The Low-Carb Kid vs. Mr. Body Alarm:

    posted 2 days ago

    I love the inaccurate superhero kinda being an anti-hero, doing things like burning the cook book section to set up a diversion and cover his tracks.

  139. On The Low-Carb Kid Saves The Earth:

    posted 2 days ago

    I love the detail of the website dropped right in the middle of the narrative. Nice touch.

  140. On Something:

    posted 2 days ago

    I simply do not like Jack.

  141. On You Can Hear Them Through The Walls:

    posted 2 days ago

    Yeah, I really like this. I love the nonsense she says to ensure she never stops talking, but I especially liked that part of me wanted to believe her.

  142. On Bagman: A Good Funeral:

    posted 2 days ago

    I’m glad John asked about the Knockers because I was scratching my head too. Great inventive slang there. This series is fantastic.

  143. On Bagman: A Good Funeral:

    posted 2 days ago

    I’m glad John asked about the Knockers because I was scratching my head too. Great inventive slang there. This series is fantastic.

  144. On Bagman: Someone Else's Problem:

    posted 2 days ago

    I love this description: A sudden spasm of pain lit my temple, a bolt of lightning straight from my cranium to the back of my right eyeball. A small window opened in the center of my vision. And the series is just as addictive for those of us reading it as it is for you!

  145. On Bagman: Live at the Scene:

    posted 2 days ago

    This is some intense stuff. Ditto on the pacing and the well-described camera portions. You can just see it in your mind.

  146. On Bagman: NOW Action News:

    posted 2 days ago

    That’s hilarious. The devotion of the news reporter and John Perkins’ comment.

  147. On Bagman: Shots Fired:

    posted 2 days ago

    I also sensed a shift in character, which means you wrote the scene well, since we’ve all noticed it.

  148. On Bagman: First Rule: Never Ask:

    posted 2 days ago

    I also dug the dialogue and I love the titular line First rule: Never ask.

  149. On Bagman: Fashionably Late:

    posted 2 days ago

    Wow, I like his confidence, throwing the goods before even seeing the money.

  150. On The Grand Fleetest Flyer Test [Fairy Tale Challenge]:

    posted 2 days ago

    Wow, a very gruesome ending. I guess his true love is still out there somewhere waiting to be pushed off a ledge.

  151. On Fairy tale challenge - Two sisters (rules & introduction):

    posted 2 days ago

    I probably won’t find the inspiration to enter this challenge, but I think it’s awesome and have enjoyed the beginning of the entries so far.

  152. On Experimental Ficlet No.24:

    posted 2 days ago

    Ooh, I wonder what he did.

  153. On Someone Else's Ceiling:

    posted 2 days ago

    The same portion that Ana Cristina mentioned made me laugh as well. Simultaneously hilarious and jarringly displaced. I also love the disjointed, morphine-induced final line.

  154. On Experimental Ficlet No.22:

    posted 2 days ago

    That was the most brilliant line so far.

  155. On Experimental Ficlet No. 18:

    posted 2 days ago

    Another great line. I have to admit I’m starting to warm up to this whole experimental series.

  156. On Experimental Ficlet No. 17:

    posted 2 days ago

    Great line.

  157. On Experimental Ficlet No. 16:

    posted 2 days ago

    Absolute awesomeness.

  158. On Experimental Ficlet No 11:

    posted 2 days ago

    I love this one. It’s funny and caught me completely off guard.

  159. On Experimental Ficlet No. 8:

    posted 2 days ago

    This is my favorite so far.

  160. On Letting Go:

    posted 2 days ago

    I love this, especially the middle paragraph and the repetition of ‘I don’t care’.

  161. On Brains or Beauty:

    posted 2 days ago

    A very different direction, but it seems like it will be interesting as well. I like how they send the prince on a quest.

  162. On Click.:

    posted 2 days ago

    Now, the sequel is yours.

  163. On Click.:

    posted 2 days ago

    Oh boy, Sassy hasn’t even gotten started and there’s already tension between them. There’s no worse sound than that click at a time like this. Now, I better put my sequeling hat on and get to work.

  164. On Two Sisters:

    posted 2 days ago

    I like the ‘discussion’ over whose name to use at the end. I feel like we’re in for something disastrous down the road. Looking forward to seeing your further spin on the challenge.

  165. On Prince William, I thank you! [Perfect Moment Ruined Challenge]:

    posted 2 days ago

    I like the reverse angle on perfection. It reminded me a little of last football season when the Dolphins could have had a perfect losing season, but ruined it by pulling out a win late in the season.

  166. On Wanted, One Muse...:

    posted 2 days ago

    Man, I could’ve identified with Ferdie last night. I could not find my muse anywhere. I like how you set everything up and then with the last line give a whole new world of context to the story.

  167. On A Moment's Hesitation:

    posted 2 days ago

    I love that she had the same idea he did. He just got ‘r done first. Fun sequel.

  168. On Seize the Moment:

    posted 2 days ago

    Wow, that was quite awesome! I didn’t see it coming at all.

  169. On Is the World Ready for Tummy Buddies?:

    posted 2 days ago

    True, Dr. Vore’s ideas are a bit unconventional, but who can argue with the results? A hot chick digests your food for you and comes out once a month to go on dates… Sounds good to me. What’s the hang up here?

  170. On Shooting Up:

    posted 3 days ago

    The pain. The desire. The reason not to. And yet the inability to resist. Very well drawn out scene. Heartbreaking, really.

  171. On Mythical Deliveries (sdrawkcab egnellahc):

    posted 3 days ago

    Yes, I think a series starting at this point and going where it did would have been awesome. But going backward to this point of origin, it was even better.

  172. On The Key (egnellahc sdrawkcab):

    posted 3 days ago

    The dream is truly horrific. It’s horrifying that she’s trying to wake and not being allowed to by the power of the dream.

  173. On Museum Badassery (egnellahc sdrawkcab):

    posted 3 days ago

    So the wound is from the box. Yeah, I’d worry about that especially if I was having crazy dreams about it in the first place And ‘Badassery’ is a word in a league of its own.

  174. On The Chase (sdrawkcab egnellahc):

    posted 3 days ago

    I’m starting to worry more about the woman in her dreams than the bite mark. Very intriguing stuff. (It’s kinda cool knowing it’s set in Turkey because I’ve been there).

  175. On Tourist in Turkey (sdrawkcab egnellahc):

    posted 3 days ago

    Yes, the scar is a great link and I wonder what it will ultimately reveal to us (I was thinking survival-horror in the beginning but this seems to be a slightly different type of tale).

  176. On Drug Problem (sdrawkcab egnellahc):

    posted 3 days ago

    I liked the detail about her first sergeant teaching her the slicing technique. It reveals a whole new slew of things about her and all in basically one line.

  177. On Life: The Challenge You Can't Afford To Refuse [New Life Challenge]:

    posted 3 days ago

    I’m frustrated by the fact that John Perkins already wrote my response ‘word for word’. He really is awesome. So as far as my emotional attachment to the piece… I loved it! I don’t know if it can be topped because it’s so brutally honest and real. Yes, “Good luck, newbie” was pure genius.

  178. On In the Half-Light:

    posted 3 days ago

    Fantastic line: I kissed her back just as firmly, reveling in the physical sensation for once rather than worrying about hurting her.

  179. On An Aversion to Blood:

    posted 3 days ago

    Okay, who am I kidding? If it’s here I’m going to have trouble not reading it. I like how you balanced the present situation with the memory of the blood test and his caring her away to the chagrin of Mike Newton.

  180. On Remembering the Kitchen Floor:

    posted 3 days ago

    I was also glad he came back! I loved the line: I heard a strange thumping noise in my ear, the corners of my mouth turned down in a slight frown, wondering what could be making that noise.

  181. On Remembering the Monster:

    posted 3 days ago

    It’s good to see how he’s starting to come to grips, but yeah, he better get there before something bad happens!

  182. On Memory 3/ Remembering Her Face:

    posted 3 days ago

    I agree. I was glad that his inner thoughts not only revealed his memories but also the look on Paige’s face when he stomped off… If he’s thinking about her he’s starting to make progress.

  183. On Remembering Crying:

    posted 3 days ago

    She’s always there for others… Great line about how she always cries alone.

  184. On Remembering Shepherd's Pie:

    posted 3 days ago

    Paige is certainly a mystery. I love how she shifts from A to C so easily. Great interaction and I wonder if she made the shepherd’s pie innocently or if it plays some motive in her plan…

  185. On New Friends for Adventure:

    posted 3 days ago

    Comy Kraleef… a name fitting of a new character in this series… Sorry, got distracted for a second listening to the dramatic music Ana cued up.

  186. On The Adventures of P.T. Agonist and...Enemies?:

    posted 3 days ago

    Great self-chosen new name for the online course-taking, now villainously advanced Dr. Edward V. Illen.

  187. On Ravenous:

    posted 3 days ago

    Okay, it’s official (I’m going to have to stop reading your epilogue and start reading Twilight)... and then finish your series.

  188. On Immunity:

    posted 3 days ago

    Ooh, I wonder what’s she’s impervious to. And I love the detail about wishing he could know her thoughts.

  189. On Overreaction:

    posted 3 days ago

    I love the nearly disastrous consequences of his last overreaction and his fear that she know longer needs him.

  190. On Edward's Promise:

    posted 3 days ago

    I like how you draw us into her dark, cold eyes and his fear. Well developed scene here.

  191. On Epilogue: Bella's Torment:

    posted 3 days ago

    Okay, I’m not familiar with Twilight, so what you do here will have a major role in deciding whether or not I investigate it further. (Not to put any pressure on you or anything).

    Great start. I loved the last line.

  192. On Becca Turns the Tables:

    posted 3 days ago

    You got sequel!

  193. On Lifestyle of the Tummy Buddy:

    posted 3 days ago

    I take it John Perkins is new to the series, but I think his observation will prove through when he goes to the beginning… This series is wildly entertaining.

  194. On Another Dinner With Cindy Lou:

    posted 3 days ago

    I was wondering what happened to Cindy Lou. Interesting to find out what she does while she’s supposedly helping the narrator’s digestion (the conversation about that was funny, but my favorite line was I decided it probably wouldn’t be helpful to point out that, for most people, digestion was automatic, and they had never had that particular need.

  195. On Dark League [League of Awesomeness 2075 Or Beyond Challenge]:

    posted 5 days ago

    Another dark and dreary future… But like you said you’re entitled to give a little warning to the LoA that you created. @Ana I love the Life of Brian reference.

  196. On The Challenge [LoA 2075 or Beyond Challenge]:

    posted 5 days ago

    Oh, I don’t like your version of the future at all. A very dark and bleak future, it is. Mandatory ficlets would erase all my fun… But, I enjoyed the story (just so long as it doesn’t come true). ;)

  197. On Experimental Ficlet No. 1:

    posted 5 days ago

    You are on a real ellipses kick today, John Perkins…

  198. On Becca Turns the Tables:

    posted 5 days ago

    After all this time Becca and Sassy are finally being honest with each other. I like their ‘hoes before bros’ motto. I love Officer Milo’s: _“Sounds like you just got burned, home-skillet.”

  199. On Minoan Information (egnellahc sdrawkcab):

    posted 5 days ago

    Another great installment and I love the word portly.

  200. On Michael the Handy Man (egnellahc sdrawkcab):

    posted 5 days ago

    A room inside the museum with a safe near a dead body, soaked in blood. My assumptions were way off. Great job!

  201. On Using a Rubber (egnellahc sdrawkcab):

    posted 5 days ago

    Wow, this is intense. I love trying to form a context for a story, getting the ending first. It makes you make assumptions. Wonder how many of mine will prove accurate. Once again, that scar stands out, vexing me.

  202. On Sinking and Floating (egnellahc sdrawkcab):

    posted 5 days ago

    The first paragraph has beautiful imagery and the ending has a bit of foreboding in it with the tingle of the angry scar. I also want to know more about it. Tiny note: in the final paragraph the word ‘The’ is missing an ‘e’.

  203. On Conclusion/Beginning: The Meaning of Freedom [egnellahC sdrawkcaB]:

    posted 5 days ago

    “Volition!” That’s the word I was searching for earlier today… This was another great series from you. You never disappoint.

  204. On Liars and Dungeons [egnellahC sdrawkcaB]:

    posted 5 days ago

    It always strikes me as strange when a wife covers something like this up that a husband does to their child. It’s almost as sick as the act itself. Loyalty is one thing, but when someone is harming your child…

  205. On Snapped [egnellahC sdrawkcaB]:

    posted 5 days ago

    What a twisted guy the father is… Abusing her, covering it up, making her out to be crazy and then visiting her and trying to keep it up. Not saying he deserves death, but he deserves real bad things to happen to him.

  206. On A Really Big Favor:

    posted 5 days ago

    I concur. I had to change the wording slightly later in the sentence to keep it under the character count, but the ellipses is golden.

  207. On Paul's Prayer:

    posted 5 days ago

    You’ve got adolescent ellipsis free sequel!

  208. On The Fall of Wal-Mart (LoA 2075+ Challenge):

    posted 5 days ago

    I loved “forcing the human race into submission” being one of the atrocities adding up to the LoA taking down Wal-Mart. Your creativity has no bounds.

  209. On .357 - The Haunting:

    posted 5 days ago

    Wow, that last line takes the story to a whole new arena of psychological intrigue. I love it!

  210. On Paul's Prayer:

    posted 5 days ago

    If I were Paul, I might have chosen the jail cell. Something tells me that a debt of honor to Sassy is not something to be trifled with. I loved his muffled squeak at the end, a perfect exit noise. Great clincher with Sassy and the cop laughing at him as he runs off… I hope he doesn’t run into anything on the way home!

  211. On The Sassy Ultimatum:

    posted 5 days ago

    Oh, that was a line I had to cut for space… I think it had something to do with resisting arrest or probable cause.

  212. On Hall of Fame [Part 2] ((2075 or Beyond Challenge)):

    posted 5 days ago

    Internet ban? In the future? Say it ain’t so! I like the nostalgic walk down memory lane leading to the youth of tomorrow being inspired to write stories of their own.

  213. On .357 - The Beginning:

    posted 5 days ago

    I detect a must-read series developing here. I love the tone you’ve used in both installments and look forward to everything unfolding.

  214. On Confusion and Regret:

    posted 5 days ago

    Great job illustrating her inner turmoil over being used by one guy and finding the other guy to not be as interesting as she initially thought as a love interest.

  215. On Talking:

    posted 5 days ago

    I loved the beginning of this because his idea of a secret space being a tree in front of the school is such a hilarious tough guy thing. And her willingness to make the best of the situation is great.

  216. On The Note:

    posted 5 days ago

    Wow, the last line in his note was rather scathing. I know he’s hurt, but gosh, that’s a little mean. Then again, she kind of deserves it.

  217. On I Hate You And I'm Glad About It:

    posted 5 days ago

    Wow, the love triangle has blown up in a real big way. Very exciting, dramatic scene.

  218. On The Car Ride:

    posted 5 days ago

    Yeah, here’s where that sense of foreboding turns into reality. Ouch. Although it is kinda creepy that Stephen is outside her house at 2:19 (or later) in the morning.

  219. On Babysitting Night:

    posted 5 days ago

    Wow, Stephen even gets slighted in camera time as well. A brief snippet of her utter lack of interest in him, while the rest of the story centers on making out with James. I still have that sense of foreboding. Something bad’s coming.

  220. On Green Stuff:

    posted 5 days ago

    LOL at THX’s comment. My thoughts so far in the series are: Richie Rich seems too good and boring for his own good, while James(on) is maybe too bad, but I guess we’ll just have to see how everything works out.

  221. On One Decision, that can Change Your Life:

    posted 5 days ago

    I love the description of how he showed her a new world that she’d never known. It harkens back to the first ficlet in the series and the glimpses we get to see of each other in relationships. Well done.

  222. On Daydreaming:

    posted 5 days ago

    Man, has she forgotten how much she liked Stephen so quickly. Laughing at Blusparrow’s comment being my exact reaction to this as well.

  223. On Flattery:

    posted 5 days ago

    A very Gilmore Girls kind of setup with the good, smiling guy and the rough around the edges tough guy, so the reference is very fitting.

  224. On The Hallway:

    posted 5 days ago

    That little flirt, playing along with him like that. I wonder how big a part James will play in the unraveling of this story. He’s definitely forward with the sudden kiss.

  225. On Green Eyes:

    posted 5 days ago

    Interesting time to bring another guy, who seems quite opposite Stephen, into the story. So close to the awkward yet romantic date and all.

  226. On Just a Kiss:

    posted 5 days ago

    Yes, that was a very awkward moment. Kind of a mood killer to be honest, but they seemed to recover realistically enough. But this Mary Cole figures to be trouble in the long run.

  227. On Like It:

    posted 5 days ago

    Ah ha. So it was a good gasp. You setup a very romantic scene here. Nothing like the feeling of being dazzled by the person you like.

  228. On Mary Cole :

    posted 5 days ago

    I love the last line ending with a gasp. Just what kinda place did he take her to? Or is it a good gasp? Reading on to find out.

  229. On Conversations:

    posted 5 days ago

    I loved the NOTE TO SELF. Very funny touch.

  230. On Dream:

    posted 5 days ago

    I like her overwhelmed thoughts at the guy actually liking her back and the brief mention of the magic of his touch.

  231. On Limos and Laughs [well, only one limo, but probably too many laughs]:

    posted 5 days ago

    I’m a lover of all attempted accents. It keeps life fresh. Funny indeed.

  232. On Ramblings Equal Rides:

    post