Ficlets

The New York Observer wants you to feel the pain of all those writers who – having gotten a book contract – now have to live with the pain of actually writing a book. Oh, the poor dears. Maybe getting a book contract isn’t the best thing that could ever happen. The only thing worse, of course, is not having one.

Of some interest here, however, is this notation that even a $100,000 book advance is not all it’s cracked up to be:

And what about that holy grail—the advance? Even the smallest advance can be justified to death as the ticket out of your office job or bartending gig. But is the money that publishers pay most writers enough to make the suffering worth it?

That money, of course, isn’t just for rent and ham sandwiches and Oreos. It’s also for the sky-high freelance taxes (about 37 percent of any untaxed income will be commandeered by Uncle Sam), agent’s fees, fax and copy tabs at the library, travel for research trips and any other number of things. Think about it: $100,000 is actually more like $65,000 after taxes—not bad. But then there’s the 15 percent agent’s cut (another $15,000), leaving you about $50,000. For a year, that’s a livable salary. But once other book expenses are taken into account—like permissions, travel, copies and the like—you’re looking at a modest pile rather than a mountain. There’s really not much left to enjoy—especially if your work stretches on for years.

Oh, waaaaaah. One solution, which is the one I subscribe to personally, is to try not to take years to write a damn book. I’ve been averaging a couple a year myself; seems like a prudent thing to do, especially considering the average advance is in fact nowhere near $100,000 (my advance on my first novel: $6,500. And that is smack dab average). Give me a $100,000 advance and I assure you I’ll find some way to survive on it.

I don’t want to run down the idea that writing a whole book is hard work; it is, and if you don’t believe me all you have to do is try it sometime. However, articles like these mostly just make me irritated at other writers, mostly because they come across as over-privileged whiners. You know, just do the work, people. That’ll solve a lot of your “problems.”