Comments on 'Pirates!'I grasped the handle of my cutlass tightly. I knew someone was just around the corner. I sensed it. I held my breath as I came closer, until I was so close that if I moved one finger, I would be discovered.
And then I leaped out and drew my cutlass out at the same time, hopefully catching the person off guard.
"Have mercy," he was a weak, timid man. I put my cutlass back in its sheath.
"This is my ship. How long have you been here?" I clenched my fists.
"I- I don't know."
"Follow me, you fool."
I got a hold of his arm and pulled him out onto the main deck. Then I rang the "get out on the deck or get thrown overboard" bell. In a minute, the whole crew was standing there. There was a buzz of excitement in the air.
"*I found this idiot hiding near the cabins. What are we going to do to him?*" I shouted to the crowd.
A rumble of responses came from the crowd such as, "throw him overboard," "take everything he has," and even a bit of "hang him by his toes so all can see." Yes, I loved being a pirate.2008-05-10T00:26:06Zhttp://ficlets.com/feed/story/29954Comment on Pirates!<p>pretty good smarty! Your descriptions are superb! I love the suspense and the elation of the pirate at the end. Read over the last sentence of the first paragraph, though. It was grammatically confusing.</p>http://ficlets.com/stories/29954?basename=612952008-05-10T00:26:06ZMistress Elsha Hawkhttp://ficlets.com/authors/mistress_elsha_hawkComment on Pirates!<p>”...I rang the ‘get out on the deck or get thrown overboard’ bell.”</p>
<p>Hahaha, that’s awesome. I thought it was interesting, although the description at the beginning prior to the stowaway’s discovery is a little awkward and could be smoothed out. However, I think it’s quite good for someone in the fifth grade. I still have some of my writings from that age, and they aren’t as good as this. Keep it up!</p>http://ficlets.com/stories/29954?basename=612482008-05-09T22:23:29Zkaellinn18http://ficlets.com/authors/kaellinn18