Josephine is growing. Sure, she's pregnant and that's expected -- _but my god._ She's one sugar cube away from a full-blown double chin. That's my sister I'm talking about in the first paragraph -- the obese pregnant one. If she ever got a hold of this journal entry my lungs would surely collapse after being sat on, so let's keep this one under wraps. The truth is I'm a victim of sibling abuse. Just recently I received the most painful purple nurple of my life after engaging with that bloated rhino. I'm innocent. I was inspired by how she sweats melted butter after NASA-like lift offs from the sitting position, and because it's apparent that she defeated the Hulk and ate him. Impressive. So I thought up a new sitcom and made her the star. I called it, _Blimpy and the Butterball Baby._ I mean, what a gift of imagination right? Oh no. She lunged at me like a tuskless walrus, grappling my nipple with the pinchiest sausage fingers, and twisted with the violent intent to rip flesh. How ungrateful! 2008-05-21T03:29:01Z http://ficlets.com/feed/story/30576 <p>I refuse to feel guilty about this story, and I refuse to apologize. It&#8217;s meant to make the reader hate the character telling the story and possibly laugh at the absurdity. There&#8217;s a difference between the characters a writer comes up with and the writer himself/herself. I in no way condone the actions of the awful people I sometimes write about, but to blame me for possibly making someone commit suicide is ridiculous and rude.</p> http://ficlets.com/stories/30576?basename=63792 2008-05-21T03:29:01Z Tad Winslow http://ficlets.com/authors/tjd <p>I have 2 say the story is a very discriminatory. I have 2 admit tht most of the funniest stories R going 2 make someone feel inferior. Its either a joke/story about a African Americans, Blondes, Overweight ppl, white ppl, retarded ppl, &#38; so on. Keep tht in mind next time U write another story/speak a joke. Think: Who may hear me/ read this &#38; be high offended. BCuz who knows, their hopes mayb down tht day &#38; then if they hear/read it they may get so depressed tht they kill themselves. Think B4 U speak/write.</p> http://ficlets.com/stories/30576?basename=63777 2008-05-21T02:52:04Z Brebelles http://ficlets.com/authors/brebelles <p> HAHAHAHA !! That is hilarious, mostly because he deserved it and partly because of how he made fun of her.<br />LoA</p> http://ficlets.com/stories/30576?basename=62401 2008-05-15T01:45:03Z Blusparrow http://ficlets.com/authors/blusparrow <p> LOL , and ow! Never mess with a hormone-crazed pregnant woman! :) <br />Love your descriptions, all about grotesque obesity, in a self-depreciating way, as if not to <em>really</em> offend, but to get a point across.</p> http://ficlets.com/stories/30576?basename=62397 2008-05-15T01:32:18Z Mistress Elsha Hawk http://ficlets.com/authors/mistress_elsha_hawk