InZanadee's Stories

Sarah III

2007-06-21T00:12:42Z

He looked down at her limp body. Her wrists had also been slashed and the blood was already becoming sticky in the heat. Instinctively, he bound them with towels to stop the bleeding and ran to call 911.
“Sarah. Sarah. Sarah.” he repeated over and over as he cradled her delicate form in his arms.
“Sarah, baby. It’s okay. We’re okay. You’ll be fine.” he said as much to himself as to her.
The minutes it took before the ambulance arrived seemed to strech on to infinity…the smell of sweat, sex, and blood making him slighty nauseaous.
“Oh Sarah.” he said into her long, dark hair. “Baby, I’ll never leave you again. Promise.”
The medics arrived and he watched as they cleaned her up and assessed her wounds in slow motion. He saw it all in movie form. Too real to BE real.
“Sarah.” he said one last time.
“Mmuph.” she answered.
He studied her pale face as they loaded her into the ambulance. His mind too overloaded to do anything but nod and stare.
“Oh, Sarah…” he said, numbly.

Presence

2007-06-20T23:57:02Z

She awoke to the blinding darkness, covered in sweat. Humidity hung in the air, clinging to her already damp skin.
She peered around, and, as her eyes adjusted, she saw she was alone. Still, she could almost feel his weight upon her. His phantom presence almost as close as the air in the tiny room. Yet, even with that information, she instinctively looked over to see if he was there. He was not. She lay back down, curling up into herself, her hand absently caressing the place where he once had lay his head. A tiny, fluffy koala bear toy stared back at her from the other pillow. Pulling it to her, she stroked it’s furry head and breathed in it’s scent. If she tried, she could still smell his silky, talcum powder smell on it. In the dark, she could almost hear his deep, even breathing next to her.
“Morgan?” her sister called to her.
“I’m in here.” she said, hiding the bear under her pillow.
“Morgan, you’ve been up here in bed all day. Come on. Join the living.” she insisted.
“Ok.” she said.

Floating

2007-06-17T17:30:56Z

Sarah moaned and tried to open her eyes, but something sticky was keeping them shut. She felt strange, sort of light, and floaty. The voice persisted.
“Not here.” She thought.
“I’m not here.”
“Mmmph” she groaned again.
She looked around the room through the glowing peachy vail of her eyelids. Searching for…something. She couldn’t quite focus on what it was she was looking for.
Uhhhg, her wrist felt raw and itchy. She wished she could scratch it somehow, but, for some reason, she just couldn’t reach it.
“Sarah?” She heard a voice say from a million miles away.
“No,” she thought, “Sarah’s not here.”
“Sarah?”
“Mmph.” She answered the voice matter of factly.
“SARAH!” the panicked voice was suddenly right next to her.
Warm, fuzzy, floaty feeling. So sleepy and peaceful. The pale pink glow through her eyelids fading to a warm amber sunset. Her mind smiled and embraced the calm of being away from her body. Floating again, she ignored the voice.
“Mmph.” was her only response.

Coming into the light

2007-05-31T19:40:08Z

The small stage was poorly lit, and she couldn’t see a thing past the floor lights.
She raised a hand to her brow to block the light a bit and peer out at the crowd.
With a deep breath, all fear left her, and she began speaking.
“Welcome, all of you, to this, My little piece of Heaven.”
The crowd clapped their approval.
“I hope you’ll find what it is you are looking for here, and maybe even a few things you weren’t. I’ve done my best to protect your anonymity, so, please, feel free to play your games here. We are safe within these walls.”
They cheered and clapped again.
“For tonight, I choose the name Mistress Helena. Now, which one of you will play with me?”

Band-aids

2007-05-30T09:03:08Z

I’m the walking wounded. But no one can see my scars. No one can see the pain I live with day in and day out. No one will whisper to a friend “That’s that poor girl who lost her child…tsk tsk.”
No one can hear my heart breaking with each and every breath I take.
Instead of pain, they see what they choose to see. But, to him…to him I was all things. And I’d failed him.
Physical pain can be dealt with. You slap a band-aid over the wound and you move on. Psychic pain is a whole other animal. Tell me, do they make band-aids for broken hearts???
The day turned a bleak shade of gray as I walked along our street to the corner store.
I picked out my usual. A bag of Twizzlers and a diet Pepsi.
I barely noticed the familiar discomfort of the rain when it began. I was too busy feeling my heart break for the 1000th time that day. Band-aids for hearts…now THERE is an idea who’s time has come. Wonder if I could patent it, I’d probably make a killing.

We make good pets

2007-05-30T08:33:40Z

The pain in her eyes painted them grey-green. No twinkle in these eyes. Nope. Just unadulterated pain.
She dared to growl at the image before her. Somehow being fierce made her feel better. She bared her teeth a little more.
The girl in the mirror grimaced back at her.
“Ugh!” she said.
“Hopeless, totally hopeless!”
She heaved a sigh of resignation. She was what she was and there was no changing that. The cat watched this strange display with half-hearted interest.
“Humans are such odd creatures.” he thought to himself.
As she continued her staring contest with her own image, he began grooming his orange-striped fur.
Yes, humans are strange, strange beasts. But at least they can open cans of tuna.
He sighed in a bored fashion and began licking his paw. “If only I had opposable thumbs…” he thought, distracted by a momentary glimmer of dust.
“Stupid girl…all the tuna you can eat and you have the nerve to be sad?”
At that he leaned over and began licking his own ass.

Sarah II

2007-05-30T08:04:40Z

He jarred the door open. The crash of wood on paneling was deafening at this hour.
He called her again…”Sarah?”
A cursory survey of the room told him she was still there. But she didn’t answer him.
“Sarah, baby?”
Emptiness answered him.
His eyes adjusted to the dim light from the bathroom. And he saw it. Her limp hand and the razor it once held.
“Oh MY GOD !”
“Sarah!”
Then he saw the wound. The gaping maw spelling out something sinister, yet loving…Johnny it read. She had spelled his name in her own blood.
“Oh Sarah, what have you done, baby?”

It's over

2007-05-30T00:49:07Z

She sat, shoulders slumped forward, on the bed. The light filtered in a most unappealing way through the motel curtains.
“Go” she said. “Just go.”
Johnny reached for his denim shirt on the bedside table. He sighed as he looked at her forlornly. Still he said nothing.
The light was blinding as he walked out the door, slicing through the semi-dark of the room.
Once he was gone, she went into the bathroom and wet her face. The shock of the cool water a welcome change from the heat.
He was gone. This time for real. A tribute to disposable relationships.
She examined the girl in the mirror closely, and she silently despised her.
Taking a deep breath, she dragged the razor across her belly. Slowly and with purpose. She needed to bleed away the pain. Needed the blood to renew her.
Then she promptly passed out on the floor.

Undeclared

2007-05-29T23:27:35Z

It’s amazing how it happens. Almost overnight, yet it takes decades. Before you know it, POOF , your life is nothing like you’d hoped it would be.
She smoothed her hair, straightened the hem of her blouse, then set her jaw resolutely.
She was not going to settle for this life. Not that it was so awful…but she was tired. Tired of being so, so, plain. How could she be satisfied?
Her dreams were so much more.
It only took one moment, but it was enough. She confidently took that final step into oblivion. No hesitation. No remorse. She just simply chose not to be this person any longer.
She opened the door to her dark side, and there was no going back.

From Within

2007-05-29T21:49:51Z

I pushed a tenative foot against it. It slipped beneath me in a visceral, guts and gore way.

I tried again. A hand this time. I tested the boundries of my world with the same result.

I both loved and loathed this glowing chamber. I knew it to be my haven as well as my prison. I could only bide my time until I no longer belonged there.

And I wondered about this creature. This “woman.” At least that is what the others called her. Even if it was in their muffled half-language. I wondered if she could hear my thoughts? Could she see with my eyes? Would she know that I can hear her thoughts? Even those that were unspoken? I could feel the hard ring of bone protecting my tiny form, cradling me…rocking me to sleep as she walked towards home.
I reached out again. This time with both hands. With equal results. They slipped down the slimy incline of her insides and came to rest before me.
How strange and wonderful this peach-orange glowing terminal. How gross and barbaric it’s feel.

The Watcher

2007-05-29T21:35:46Z

She watched him shyly from behind her books. She’d been watching him for weeks, now.
She knew his walk. She knew the sound of his voice. She even knew his smell.

But she was invisible to him.

He was one of the “beautiful people.” He was blessed with perfect hair and fabulously straight teeth.

And yet, he was somehow different from them.

It wasn’t obvious. You’d only know the difference if you’d studied him as she had.

But the difference made him somehow humble in her eyes.

As he passed her by this time, she inhaled his scent deeply and secretly. Her body nourished by that iota of essence that was him.

Her mind called out to him, and it seemed, just for a moment, he was about to answer her…
Then SHE showed up.

Get Out

2007-05-29T17:03:36Z

“Johnny?”
“Yeah?”
“Is it really over?”
“Yeah.”

“Then get the hell out,please.”

One hell of a week

2007-05-29T16:59:37Z

So I managed to get out of bed one more time. So what? Of course, I couldn’t remember who’s bed it was. I looked over at him forlornly. No, wait, I looked over at her forlornly. Hell, who cares how I looked at them? Just seeing the two of them curled into one another made me ill.
How sweet. How comforting. How fucking nauseating.
I searched the rumpled clothes for my jeans. Hell, even those were missing. I’d say it was one hell of a night…if that’s all it was. It was more like one hell of a week! And I still can’t remember their names. As if it’s of any importance anyway.

love and pain

2007-05-29T16:42:18Z

It was hard, yes, but not at all what I had expected. No, instead of feeling his manhood pressing into me, I felt something completely frightening.
The dagger was ornate…as if carved for royalty. Jeweled and beautiful…and exciting as hell. I was terrified of what he intended, yet, transfixed by the possibilities.
He held it to my throat, just so that I’d feel the bite of the edge. I held my breath waiting for the next move. He just smiled at me in the moonlight as he slipped a finger inside of me. The rage, the pain, the mingling of excitement and fear…it was more than I could take.
I came in wracking bursts. My breath ragged and ashamed. He held the dagger closer to my throat as he made love to me. Love? Yes, because even in it’s violence there was a tenderness to his touch.
He both loathed and loved me. And I him.

Money for Nothing

2007-05-18T20:14:08Z

“Oh for the love of Gawd!” She thought, silently cursing the image staring back at her. Just one … more…wiggle…and… SNAP ! As the blood trickeld down her chin, she grinned at the toothless girl in the mirror.
“Ugh! I hate teeth!” She lisped. They were God’s second mistake. (The first being that whole man/woman mating ritual.) I mean really ...first you get to go through the horrible pain and agony of teething as a baby. You know, when NO ONE can explain…hey, that itchy-burning feeling is just your teeth cutting through the flesh of your mouth. THEN , you get the singular pleasure of losing those teeth in favor or newer, bigger, more efficient ones. YAY ! Teething all over again! And, as if that wasn’t enough, there’s no promise of keeping those teeth for the rest of your life.
“Yup!” She whistled. Just a few more to go. She rinsed her bloodied mouth with cool water.
“What in the heck was He thinking?” Teeth. Pfftt.