madwriter108's Stories

My Random And Irrelevant Random Sentence Dare

2008-08-24T15:57:02Z

” So, Hilary, what do you like on your waffles?”

” Is that a tatto of a chuprachapra on your wenus( elbow )?”

“I have a confession, everyone- I’M IN LOVE WITH MY HIGHLIGHTER !!!!!!!!!!”

” Wow, those hurdles were like coffecake”

” Is my mustache buttoned straight?”

“Arrrrrruuuuuuubbbbbbbbaaaaaa!!!!!!!That’s a funny word!!!!”

” This throw-up tastes like pizza, and this pizza tastes like a climate crisis”

“What is the difference between a Mac and a PC?”

“To the t-t-t-oppp, to the toaster, for reals!!!!”

‘Would you like to open yourzebra now…....or later?”

“The sky is irrelevant.”

“Dude, your mom still has five of my video games!!!!!”

The Eyes Are Always Upon Us-Part 3 ( my very own entry to my very own 50th ficlet challenge)

2008-08-19T23:45:58Z

4/5/2091
Blog#2034
We don’t want to take our chances spending the night here, so we’re heading home with the few gaint dead beaver-bunnies and sabertooth artic terns we have.

But, first, a romanitc quick dinner (lit by virtual candlelight)

We fed Benny some of our toasted corn kernels as we made out in the moonlight. I ran over to adjust the virtual candlelight, and when i bent overto pick up some discarded corn kernels, Lucy smacked my butt.

I was as red as a tomato then, but it felt so good.

” Oh ,my nutty Lucy, let me chase you!” I yelled as I chased Lucy playfully. She giggled, tripped over a boulder, and I kissed her again.

Everything was so perfect then.

That is, until Benny howled and whined, and scratched my shins, which he only does when there’s trouble.

Then,three Russian soldiers( who I guess knew some English) came and pointed their machine guns at us, and barked, ” All ‘vight, you lovebirds! Take your hands off each other, and raise them in the air! ‘Party’s over!”.

The Eyes Are Always Upon Us-Part 2 ( my very own entry to my very own 50th ficlet challenge)

2008-08-19T22:23:38Z

4/5/2091
Blog#2033
Ah, my favorite day of the week-hunting day.

It was just gonna be me and Lucy this time for more reasons than one. One of the reasons was that Erik, Andre, and Sabrina had sprained ankles and spider bites;The others had stayed back at the shelter to nurse them back to help, but also for the other reason-

Me and Lucy had a thing for each other.( We’ve knwon each other since preschool.)

We each grabbed a thermal sack that was light enough to carry on our backs.In the sacks were : food( in portable, microwave-save cubes), weapons, my computer, our pod phones, laser spray, two sleeping bags, tasers, wood, bug spray,radar sensors, digital sensors, plenty of water, matches,etc.

We also brought our pet wolf, Benny.

We usually hid behind the trees that were still there after the hurricane before finding our prey to kill.

We waited three hours; We were then drained and out of energy.

I looked lovingly at Lucy, and said,” We should head home soon,my peanut butter baby?

The Eyes Are Always Upon Us( My very own entry to my very own 50th ficlet challenge)

2008-08-19T18:37:18Z

4/3/2091

Blog#2032:

It’s been eight years now. We’ve been in hiding ever since the war started. It’s much more peaceful up here in Greenland; Plus, they won’t send robots disguised as fellow refugees or civilians to come up here and probe us until we are forced to tell them everything.

The moment we ( Me, Lucy, Jaques, Tom, Brian, Meg, Jordan, Erik, Andre, Bambii, Greg, Belladini, Sabrina, Lola, Jose, and Alfred- the others who are with us now left earlier, before the warnings from the government appeared as text messages on our pod phones) heard the bombings in Los Angeles, we packed only the nessary things-and fled immediately.

Sure, you’d think it’s cold up here( by the way i hope the gov’t won’t read this), but becuase of global warming and everything else, there’s killer misquitos up here. We can never go out at night, and we have to be back before dusk. Or. Else. We. Will. Be.Found.( The problem with this war isn’t the fighting, but the watching, if you know what I mean.)

*MY 50th FICLET CHALENGE!!!

2008-08-19T14:52:02Z

The moment has come…..........for….......... –
MY 50th FICLET CHALLENGE !!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok, all you ficleteers, listen up! Attencion!I’m very excited about my 50th Ficlet Challenge, yet I want to make it short and sweet and to the point. The challenge is to : Create a well, thought-out explanation/story/series of what the world would be like during World War III . Remember, make it really convincing, pull the reader in, and don’t be afraid to be specific about what you’re talking about. Also, make it pretty realistic, as if it could happen. That’s all for now. Good Luck!

The Funniest Man In The World-Part 3

2008-08-18T20:47:35Z

He ran to the fairgrounds as fast as he could after hitching a ride on top of a garbage truck, and being thrown off after much laughter and ridicule.

Damn, no one takes me seriously, anymore.

When he made it to the fairgrounds, he searched in every knook and crannie and everywhere else for their tent-but it was gone.The man who juggled fire laughed at him, and he threw a flaming kabob at him with a note.The funniest man in the world opened the note, which said-Find the box shaped like a banana if you ever want to see your family again.

Eventually, he slipped on a banana, whcih led him to the box, of course.He opened the box, there was a little dummy with a time bomb strapped to his chest.The dummy quickly said,” if you ever want to see your family again, go to the tippity-tappity top of the Seattle Space Needle-they’ll be there, buddy!Bring you funnyness,and be prepared to give it all up forever if you don’t want to see your family die.”

The man threw the dummy into the air,and then he:

BARBIE'S RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT!

2008-08-18T20:22:34Z

ATTENTION TO THE POLITICAL WORLD – Barbie has decided to run for president!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’m News Reporter, Walter Sum. Buddy here with the latest from L.A-, here with Barbie today for a few questions on why she has chosen the political track in life, and how, iof elcted, she will make, not only our nation, but the world a better place.

W: Now, Barbie, why do you want to run for president?

B: Well, to all my shopping buddies out there, you can expect a lot more malls in America! I mean, like,Walter, do like shopping for the perfect shoe-

W: Um, I wear two shoes, and you should really stick to the questions, because we only have fiv-

B: Let’s go shopping!Let’s go find all the latest styles for back to school! Let’s go shopping for the perfect dress! Let’s go shopping for the perfect eyeliner! perfect top!Let’s go shopping for size 0 jeans that only I can wear!Let’s go food shopping!I love to go the beach! Do you love to go to the beach?I d-

W:Shoot, this one’s an imposter!Until next week.

Cave of Adventure

2008-08-17T14:12:42Z

” How are we gonna get out of here? The exits are blocked,” I said.

I used my pickaxe to try to poke an airhole through the cave. A little tunnel of light was channeling through here.

” ‘Dunno. It’s kinda nice, here, tho” Dan said.

” Plus, I can hunt for food,” T.Wolf exclaimed. He sharpened his claws; Then he yanked a hook out of his bellybutton.

” I guess we can just chillax for nows,” Dan said as he plopped onto one of our few modern-day possessions-the faded tan couch, and zoned out in front of the tube.

” I say we kill him now, or I can find the others and skin them alive!” T. Wolf cried to me.

” Well, it’s not like we’re gonna die here,” I said.

Immediately, after I said that, the refrigerator got up and started to amke a run for it. Then, the phone rang. I picked up the phone.

” Hey, is your refrigerator running?” Calvin sneered into the
phone.

” This time, yes!!!!!” I screamed.

” Well, you better go catch it!” he said.

No Words

2008-08-16T19:52:53Z

” Umm,hi,” I said as I closed the door behind me.I thought that I had seen her before;maybe it was in a dream. I felt like was in a dream at the moment.

“I’m Kyle, have we met before?” I asked.

No response.

I looked at the photo she was holding. I saw a very rugged/tough looking man in the photo. He looked like he was gonna rip someone’s head off, but he had a slight smile on his face.

“Who’s that?Your dad?” I asked.

No response.

Long, brown tangles of hair were blocking her from the rest of the world; her right hand was burried in her face.Her other hand was loosely gripping the photo.

” You miss him, huh? I feel for you;it’s ok to cry” I said to her.

Hospital workers were running all over the place. It was like a circus. I was wondering if a circus was racing through her head right now.I sat down on the couch next to her. I put my arm around her, and she nuzzled her head on my shoulder, and cried.

I was out of words to say;Words are useless,anyways.

BREAKING NEWS EXCLUSIVE:BARBIE SPOTTED AT SAN DIEGO ZOO

2008-07-31T19:29:17Z

BREAKING NEWS EXCLUSIVE : Barbie was last spotted at the San Diego zoo feeding part of her soy bar to some of the gazelles.They were reported to have developed into semi-mutated freaks with hairy wings and spikes all over their butts. Some of them have flown out of their cages- OH MY GOD !ONE OF THEM JUST POOPED ON MY NEW JACKET ! THANKS A LOT , BARBIE!!!!!

Barbie is fully responsible for disobeying the rules at the San Diego Zoo and for the cause of the rapid growth and escape of more than half of the gazelles.

No charges have been filed yet against Barbie,but some employees of the San Diego Zoo have spoken out said, quote, “Barbie is a sweet, kind,smart young woman who is a joy to have as a regular visitor to our zoo. She is an animal rights activist in addition to being an actress/model/spokeperson/mom/veryfrequent shopper/etc…We know that she never would do anything to hurt an animal,and she is very sorry for what she has done,and that she will speak out and make an apology statement very soon,”

The Little Jimmy Chronicles:Book 1-Chapter 2

2008-07-31T17:47:07Z

” Somebody call 911!My little Jimmy is gone!” Little Jimmy’s mom yelled out into the street.

She went back up the steps, opened the kitchen door, closed it, and went inside.Her forehead was as red as a pomegranete. She was pacing in circles; worried lines were all over her face…

Meanwhile,the box budged a bit and slid down the wooden kitchen floor.Then, all of a sudden, grotesgue, slimy, muscular, green arms and legs sprouted out of the cardboard cereal box.Muffled screams camefrom the box.

” Hmm…What’s that noise?MICHAEL!COME DOWN HERE !!!” Little Jimmy’s mom yelled.

” I swear he must be up to something, always torturing poor Little Jimmy, ” she muttered under her breath.

Olive shaped,corn-colored eyes popped out of the cereal box. The eyes circled the room and looked towards the window. When Little Jimmy’s mom wasn’t looking, the cereal box hopped up over the cabinets and onto the counter, and out the window!!!

“Jimmy?!?!!!?”

The Signal:Part 2

2008-07-31T15:20:04Z

Shoot. They had found me.They grabbed me by the collar just as I was about to wing it jumping out the window.

” Mr. Smith…..Smith, is it??? Um, anyways, you are under arrest. If we read you your rights, it will slow us down, and we need all the time we got to book ‘ya. Besides, we think you know the drill by now, anyways,”Benson” said.

“Officer H.G. Browne, if you don’t mind, hand me the handcuffs, please?” “Benson”said again.

” Aww, you guys are real jerks,” I said as I winked at both of them.Their disguises were pretty convincing at first; I had trouble recognizing them.

“Yea, well, we do the best we can, Kyle,” Benson said as “Brownie” put the hand cuffs on me.

” You owe us, big time, and, besides, didn’t Boss tell you to come alone?” Brownie said as both of them put me in the back of their “police car”.

” well, whatever, we should just go now, “I said.

We soon sped off the curb of the outdoor ramp of the empty parking lot, flying in the sky.Well, at least for now…

The Carrots of SwissPasture: Part 1

2008-07-21T02:16:02Z

Oh, they were beginnning to fade away.They were being shot and killed; an unusual suprise, for the Carrots of SwissPasture had been living peacefully in the fields for over 200 years.

They’d be gone soon; time was running out.

One of the remaining eight family members, Bennii,was busy thinking of a plan of how and when to leave before the Hares of Black Forest would come and force them into extinction.The eight remaining members were the last of their kind; they were the last hope of their family.

Cornelia, Bennii’s older and wiser sister, had known that this was going to happen. But she didn’t want her family to realize that somebody was going to have to die in order for their family to live on and survive.

This was going to be bad news for everyone; Bennii would be crushed if he knew he’d live on while somebody would die;he was hesitant whenever change came along.

The whole family had to hurry. Every second wasted was another second closer to someone’s untimely death.

The Signal: Part 1.

2008-07-19T21:53:45Z

” Hey, why are you calling me, boss?” I asked.

” We want you back at headquarters, it’s vital that you come here. We wouldn’t want to pull an A627 again, but we’ll hav to if you don’t come,” Boss/”BigBen” said.

” All right, fine! I’ll come,”I replied.I glanced nervously at the clock-time was running out. I needed to leave-immediately.

” Wait! Before you go, remember-come alone, and don’t forget to bring the stuff,” Boss instructed.

” Yea, sure. I’ll be there, but-should I be prepared for anything?” I asked.

No answer.

The phone was off the hook…...

Somebody must have cut the wires -or worse! I knew that there was no turning back…..

I…..had….to….........JUMP!!!!!!!!!!

pizza pizza pizza: the story of how some random kid got his first date

2008-06-17T00:58:17Z

I was sitting on my butt watching t.v. when the doorbell rang. I got up and got the door.

When I opened the door, who should be there right in front of me but the hottest girl in school dressed in a tight-fitting pizza girl uniform.

” You ordered extra pepperoni on ur pizza, right, John?” she asked. She ran her hands though her silky smooth black hair.

” And by the way, like, please pay me 10 extra bucks because , like,i’m almost done earning money with this job, and like, if anybody else sees me doing this, my social life is, like over, like!”she pleaded.

“By the way, if you didn’t, order so much pizza, like, and watch so much T.V., and didn’t suck at baseball, and weren’t like, fat, I’d totally go out with you,” she said as she smiled, took my money, gave me my pizza, and walked away.

I screamed out the door:” Hey sexy! What about me tutoring you tonight?”

” Oh yea! ” she said.

I got into her stylish convertible and we dove off into the night.