Sanctuary

by Colin

All I could focus on was the sound of the rain. My head became a battleground for the thunderous thuds that the droplets made as they fell upon the skylight. Time seemed frozen in its tracks, but at the moment, time only existed for me. The rain continued to dance on my ear drums, almost like a bass line, as the music of Beethoven’s “Pathetique” drifted in, then out again, of my mind.

I held the photograph in my hands, watching it, looking at it over and over, as though by some miracle it would be different; changed; like opening an empty fridge, walking away, then opening it again a moment later, expecting it to magically be full of food (we’ve all done that). But the photograph was still the same.

Somehow I could now feel the rain on my face, the tormenting sound of it still crashing on the skylight. A drop fell onto the picture, only not a raindrop. A tear. My tear.

I closed my eyes and held the picture to me and wept, “I can’t believe my father is dead.”

Comments

Average Reader Rating: 5.0 stars out of 5

  1. Sanctuary

    Tad Winslow's Buddy Icon Tad Winslow

    Posted 5 months ago

    Excellent writing. Well balanced descriptions. My head became a battleground for the thunderous thuds that the droplets made as they fell upon the skylight.—my favorite line. It gives more than just a sense of sound, it also gives a glimpse of the miniature world that that sound creates, in the mind.

  2. Sanctuary

    Melia's Buddy Icon Melia

    Posted 5 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Amazing writing. The choice of music was fitting as well. My daughter is learning that piece right now so it’s been drifting around my house for a while. This is a really beautiful glimpse of grief.

  3. Sanctuary

    Music-Hearted's Buddy Icon Music-Hearted

    Posted 5 months ago

    Incredibly well written. It draws you in entirely and just creates the picture in the your mind. Beautiful.

  4. Sanctuary

    THX 0477's Buddy Icon THX 0477

    Posted 5 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    I like the little touch of levity in the middle of the heaviness of it all. Gives it a nice balance before the heartbreaking ending…not that I was expecting a happy ending on this one.
    LoA

  5. Sanctuary

    SKermitgorf's Buddy Icon SKermitgorf

    Posted 5 months ago

    The reality of the situation. felt real.
    comic relife to break the tension.. could hear the sounds and see the rain in my mind, worthy of being featured.
    1st ive read of your stories.. look forward to reading more.
    LoA

  6. Sanctuary

    Tears of Phoenix's Buddy Icon Tears of Phoenix

    Posted 4 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    It’s really an amazing piece. It draws you in and keeps you there. I can feel it. The lightly humorous middle gives me the feeling of a last attempt to stop from breaking down entirely, a “final barrier”, if you will.

    I see the scene as a dark greyscale. It happens with me, I get a color from a piece of writing. I’m wondering if this happens with anyone else?

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