Leda

by blueyedwonder

Add to AIMShare

It was a normal day for him: wake up, think of Leda, make an offering to Demeter, milk the cows, think of Leda, hoe his fields, think of Leda, water his fields…

But sadly, it didn’t end normally. His irrigation ditch was clogged up by something. Frustrated, he hiked up to the stream.

Leda’s body lay in the water.

Her pale, smooth neck was nicked and there was a gaping slice of flesh missing in her chest. But none of it had any blood or scabs surrounding it, Leda could have been posing for a still life…except she was dead. His throat tight, he caressed her cold cheek.

He knew what bloodless wounds meant.

A god had heartlessly sliced her open like an animal.

Blindly, he stumbled back to his farm, and into his house. Leda dead…no, it couldn’t be.

Leda, Leda, taunted a soft voice in his head. He clumsily lit a small pyre and threw some incense over it.

O, Demeter, please save Leda’s poor soul. And please, please, O Great Goddess, tell me who did this and why Leda…Why Leda?

Prequels

Write a prequel

Sequels

Write a sequel

Comments

Average Reader Rating: 5.0 stars out of 5

  1. Leda

    THX 0477's Buddy Icon THX 0477

    Posted 9 months ago

    I like it. A bit simplistic, or maybe I’m in a pissy mood. I’ll rate it another day perhaps.

  2. Leda

    SKermitgorf's Buddy Icon SKermitgorf

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Nooo Not Leda… thts tragic.. the writing was gripping well done! The use of italics enhanced the story.

  3. Leda

    cainegreene's Buddy Icon cainegreene

    Posted 9 months ago

    I’m not big on the Greek myths but liked the whole piece ficlet to ficlet. Question is Leda a goddess or a Landowner? Was unsure why Demeter was thinking of Leda, praying to her or worrying she would come down hard on him. Not that it matters she is dead but can’t cross the river Styx, yes?

  4. Leda

    blueyedwonder's Buddy Icon blueyedwonder

    Posted 9 months ago

    no, no…sorry, should probably revise this…but acantheus loves leda, and since acantheus is a landowner, the god(dess) he respects most is demeter, goddess of the grain.

  5. Leda

    YodaOnCrack's Buddy Icon YodaOnCrack

    Posted 9 months ago

    Honestly, this reads a bit awkward but there is something here I like. Do not ever say “sorry” for what you’ve written though… I just think the descriptions need work. Instead of adjectives, try using metaphors and similes. (i.e. – instead of their was a cut in her heart, how about her heart bled like milk spills from an open bottle) – these are tried and true description techniques. Again, I really like this – just trying to help with your descriptions.

  6. Leda

    blueyedwonder's Buddy Icon blueyedwonder

    Posted 9 months ago

    mmk thx. :]

Want to comment on this ficlet? You need to sign in!