At Water's Edge

by Laine the Grey

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“Please,” Jonathan pleaded with the tall man, “She can’t breathe down here, like we can.” The man blinked before snapping his fin-like fingers. A bubble surrounded Winnie and she breathed deeply. The man left through an unseen exit.
“Jonathan, what was the naughty thing you did?” Winnie’s eyes spelled fear.
“I said the unforgivable words.” He whispered.
“What were they?”
“Ô Mort, viex capitaine, il est temps! levons l’ancre! Ce pays nous ennuie, Ô Mort!” Jonathan’s eyes closed as he whispered the words.
“But, why? Jonathan, why would that make all of this happen?” Winnie couldn’t understand.
“Because, Winnie, I said them at the water’s edge. And that was asking for it.”

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Comments

Average Reader Rating: 4.5 stars out of 5

  1. At Water's Edge

    Laine the Grey's Buddy Icon Laine the Grey

    Posted about 1 year ago

    The French part is from a French poem that Daniel Handler put in The End.

  2. At Water's Edge

    Ana Cristina's Buddy Icon Ana Cristina

    Posted about 1 year ago

    4.0 out of 5 stars

    Mysterious and evocative. But I feel that the characters’ names are almost too “normal” for this story. Consider maybe using more exotic names.

  3. At Water's Edge

    emma jo_234's Buddy Icon emma jo_234

    Posted about 1 year ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    wow…thats great. what does the French mean?

  4. At Water's Edge

    THX 0477's Buddy Icon THX 0477

    Posted about 1 year ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Me, I like the normal names, makes it easier to relate to them in their bizarre circumstance.

    And for fun, the French part is roughly, “Oh death, old [spelling?] captain, it is time! Let’s raise the anchor! This country annoys us, oh death!” And I only had to double-check one word in the dictionary!

  5. At Water's Edge

    Sailor Emo's Buddy Icon Sailor Emo

    Posted about 1 year ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    woah! THis is cool!

  6. At Water's Edge

    artistsrunwild's Buddy Icon artistsrunwild

    Posted about 1 year ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    im deeply entrigued by this series…its very sweet and poetic yet has some interesting themes – such as Jonathan’s seemingly mythical role….

    i like it

  7. At Water's Edge

    Laine the Grey's Buddy Icon Laine the Grey

    Posted about 1 year ago

    Thanks THX 0477 for translating it.

  8. At Water's Edge

    Alexa ♥'s Buddy Icon Alexa ♥

    Posted 11 months ago

    4.0 out of 5 stars

    I said them at the water’s edge. And that was asking for it
    I like it – has that “Bloody Mary” feel to it.
    ~
    As for the names, Winnie’s a human (as far as we know); she adopted (as far as we know) Jonathan, so it makes sense to me that she’d give him a human name. Plus, I like names that easy to pronounce.

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