The Others

by Tiggerstripn2

I sat up my hand raced to retrive my flashlight.
The fog momentarily cleared in front of me;
what was one is now a pack.
A pack moving slowly, cautiously, closer to me.
One in the lead.
I pulled myself up to run my ankle instantly folded under my weight.
Massive pain shot through my leg, it’s broken.
I pulled myself across the dry powdered ground;
the dust clouded my face.
I could taste it.
Praying, hoping I was still headed in the right direction.
It growled, I looked behind me, it was right on me;
drool hanging from the sides of it’s mouth.
I turned and screamed as I felt the first of the long sharp fangs tear into my flesh.
I took my flashlight and hit it serveral times on the head;
it squealed and ran off as the others caught up to me.
I pulled my blade and swung.

Comments

Average Reader Rating: 4.5 stars out of 5

  1. The Others

    ○○♥Promises Broken & Backs Turned♥○○'s Buddy Icon ○○♥Promises Broken & Backs Turned♥○○

    Posted 8 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    this is excellent,
    u might wanna correct that sentence though
    “the dusty clouded my face”

  2. The Others

    Tiggerstripn2's Buddy Icon Tiggerstripn2

    Posted 8 months ago

    oh thanks I was in a hurry

  3. The Others

    Lone Writer's Buddy Icon Lone Writer

    Posted 8 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Congrats on being featured, Tigger! And amazing story too!

  4. The Others

    THX 0477's Buddy Icon THX 0477

    Posted 8 months ago

    4.0 out of 5 stars

    Third ficlet from the series to be featured. Really goes to show how awesome things can get with creative collaboration! Wil must be so proud.

  5. The Others

    insomniac's Buddy Icon insomniac

    Posted 8 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Awesome.

  6. The Others

    Jennifer Meow's Buddy Icon Jennifer Meow

    Posted 8 months ago

    wow
    so good
    ><

  7. The Others

    Yeah Write!'s Buddy Icon Yeah Write!

    Posted 8 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    pretty good! i like this story almost as much as Wil’s(which is a lot)! the one thing i have to point out is that Wil’s was written in 2nd person (you…) but yours is written in 1st person.

  8. The Others

    Dana ♥'s Buddy Icon Dana ♥

    Posted 8 months ago

    4.0 out of 5 stars

    I like the story it really good, but if the person had a swored or blade, why did she have to use the flashlight??

  9. The Others

    Tiggerstripn2's Buddy Icon Tiggerstripn2

    Posted 8 months ago

    Flashlight was already in his hand

  10. The Others

    YodaOnCrack's Buddy Icon YodaOnCrack

    Posted 8 months ago

    I liked this. changed the POV , but great nonetheless. :) LoA. – Yoda

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