I Remember

by Tears of Phoenix

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I remember the games we used to play. You were there sometimes, visiting your grandparents who lived next door. We bounced on the trampoline, making games as we went. We were cats, we were dogs, we were eggs, we were famous, we were anything we wanted to be. I remember parades up and down the street with cookware and towels. I remember making music with a plastic trumpet and more whistles and kazoos than we could ever reasonably use. I remember seeing a snake in the backyard and running into my house with you screaming. I remember bicycle rides. We rode too close, so close we thought we would run into each other and crash, but we didn’t. I remember a love note left in the back door on an index card, and getting rejected, and playing the next day like nothing ever happened. And one day, it was gone. I moved. I can never go back. I may never see you again. But there is something I can do. It is something I will always do.

I will remember.

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Comments

Average Reader Rating: 5.0 stars out of 5

  1. I Remember

    Tears of Phoenix's Buddy Icon Tears of Phoenix

    Posted 11 months ago

    Okay, I wrote it in a fit of emotion. Not exactly autobiographical, now that I read it again. Sadly, I can’t edit it. I guess it’s more of a “wish-I-could-go-back-again” type of thing, kind of appropriate for a Hallmark card, or a voice-over for one of those cheesy holiday movies on the local station (especially the last line). Oh well.

  2. I Remember

    Rowan Mayfair's Buddy Icon Rowan Mayfair

    Posted 11 months ago

    reflective and sweet!! It makes me wanna write a poem so stop being so hard on yourself, I think everyone has a memory like that!!!! I Loved it!!!!

  3. I Remember

    THX 0477's Buddy Icon THX 0477

    Posted 11 months ago

    I thought it was lovely, a sort of snapshot of childhood, which I think fits perfectly with the challenge to fit something autobiographical into the space of a ficlet.

  4. I Remember

    Tears of Phoenix's Buddy Icon Tears of Phoenix

    Posted 11 months ago

    Ah, thanks! I guess it’s the stereotypical artist thing, never satisfied with the work they do and all that. Which, I suppose, is good. Otherwise we wouldn’t have a motivation to do better.

  5. I Remember

    [pens&feathers]'s Buddy Icon [pens&feathers]

    Posted 10 months ago

    This was fabulous. You convey the emotion really well here. Loved it! : )

  6. I Remember

    SKermitgorf's Buddy Icon SKermitgorf

    Posted 10 months ago

    You can go back and edit, i edit mine all the time..but i see nothing in this ficlet that needs editing, in my opion, it’s spot on emotional memory. great job. keep up the good work and write more Luke.

  7. I Remember

    Maybe_Miseryx's Buddy Icon Maybe_Miseryx

    Posted 10 months ago

    this was cute and really nicely written,
    nice job !

  8. I Remember

    Stovohobo's Buddy Icon Stovohobo

    Posted 10 months ago

    I agree with everyone else; the timing was good, the descriptions and style were good, basically all of it was good! Great reflection.

  9. I Remember

    Sophia D'Soleil's Buddy Icon Sophia D'Soleil

    Posted 10 months ago

    The challenge was to write about yourself, and in that aspect you certainly succeeded. You captured my attention with your memories and tugged at my heartstrings with your somber ending. It was real, and that is what made it amazing.

  10. I Remember

    wytherwings' Buddy Icon wytherwings

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    i really liked it, i agree with kermitgorf, that nothing needs editing!!! it was great =]

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