Hollywood Heroin 3

by Fyora Cartagan

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Dear Hollywood Heroin,
People keep dying around me, but it’s weird. If I touch them, I can bring them back to life. The only problem is, if they’re alive for more than a minute, an equal life is taken. What should I do?
—Reviver Pie

Dear Pie,
Go get some psychiatric help, dude. You have some serious problems, and an advice columnist is not the place to go.

Dear Hollywood Heroin,
I was kidnapped by a serial killer and forced into taking your namesake drug by the serial killer. This brought back memories of my traumatic childhood. I know that a lot of serial killers have childhood problems just like me.
—Criminally Sane

Dear Criminally Sane,
Yeah, you’ve got problems, and serial killers have problems, but everyone else has problems too! You should be an actor, having a traumatic childhood is an automatic “in” for an Oscar. Especially if you get on Oprah and tell your story.

Prequels

Write a prequel

Sequels

Write a sequel

Comments

  1. Hollywood Heroin 3

    Fyora Cartagan's Buddy Icon Fyora Cartagan

    Posted 9 months ago

    I felt like using TV shows I watch as basis for this.
    Reviver Pie is from “Pushing Daisies”
    and Criminally Sane is from “Criminal Minds” my favorite character, even though I don’t know his name. haha.

  2. Hollywood Heroin 3

    SKermitgorf's Buddy Icon SKermitgorf

    Posted 9 months ago

    cool. I love Pushing Daisies, so original and quirky. as were your answers

  3. Hollywood Heroin 3

    THX 0477's Buddy Icon THX 0477

    Posted 9 months ago

    I really liked the second one. Oprah has too much power, if you ask me. But that’s totally aside from the point.

    LoA

  4. Hollywood Heroin 3

    SocccerISmyLIFE's Buddy Icon SocccerISmyLIFE

    Posted 8 months ago

    lol. This whole series wass soo funny!

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