Ficlets

Snowfall

Nina looked down from the 65th floor. The first snow of the year covered buildings, the walkways connecting them, and the empty streets below.

Nina probed the apartment until she found her granddaughter.

Arina, Nina psyked, look at the snow! Nina flashed her the view through the polyglass.

It just sits there, Arina replied. It looks boring.

Nina smiled sadly. Arina had never been outside and never would, but with no war to fight, nobody would ever take her from her father the way she’d been taken from her mother. At least they had that.

Her son called from the doorway. “Mom? Are you ready to go?”

“In a minute,” Nina said.

“We have to go,” he said, gently. “The ceremony starts in an hour.”

The snow began to fall again. It looked just like the ashes that fell on Minsk the last time Nina (or anyone still alive) had breathed unfiltered air.

“It’s silly,” she said.

“You’re a hero. It’s about time they recognized that.”

She flashed on Arina.

“I already have all the recognition I need.”

Comments

Average Reader Rating:

Snowfall
Nick
Posted 7 months ago

Excellent ficlet. I love the way the world slowly unfolds into a science-fiction atmosphere. Splendid.
Snowfall
Melia
Posted 7 months ago

Futuristic holocaust survivor-ish. Like the worst of our history repeated itself far into the future. Amazing what you can dream up just from looking at a picture. Very cool Wil.
Snowfall
MRay
Posted 7 months ago

The snow-as-ash reminds me of Carmac McCarthy’s “The Road”. Very eerie imagery. I’m also reminded of Charleton Heston in the “Omega Man”, living in a high rise building fighting zombies.

Very nice.
Snowfall
Viki
Posted 7 months ago

I’d be very interested in reading more from these characters and this world. Looking forward to the sequels/prequels that will come from this.
Snowfall
Wil Wheaton
Posted 7 months ago

Thanks, everyone. Ficlets won’t let me post comments, so if this goes through, I’ll add more later.
Snowfall
Maddawg
Posted 7 months ago

Clearly written – great example here of how to write descriptions without overusing adjectives / overdoing it…
Snowfall
Wil Wheaton
Posted 7 months ago

I wanted to write something in the same universe as The Fifteenth, and I had this character, Nina, in mind, but I didn’t know where to start, so I hit the inspiration link.

When I saw this picture, I thought, “Hey, what if the won the war, but poisoned the planet? How would that feel?”

There’s a lot more that I didn’t put in her, backstory about Nina and her mother, but that’s beyond the scope of a ficlet, I think.
Snowfall
Mistress Elsha Hawk
Posted 7 months ago

I’m not familiar with The Fifteenth, so I’m curious about this world. Nice use of the picture!
Snowfall
pie_is_good
Posted 7 months ago

Really enjoyed it! It took me a second reading to catch what was going on, but I’m pretty sure that was my fault for trying to read something at three am. Not yours.

Good job! Glad your wrote another little piece of fiction :)
Snowfall
Tad Winslow
Posted 7 months ago

Great idea, reminds me of something Kurt Vonnegut Jr. might scribe—I’ve wondered if war is truly the answer to ending war, and unless I’m mistaken this world you’ve created is one that has achieved peace through war…? Thought provoking.
Snowfall
someday_93
Posted 7 months ago

Wow…futuristic, in a way…sounds sorta like the plot of a movie my best friend and I made once. And the picture is perfect.
LoA
Snowfall
Terminus
Posted 7 months ago

It’s a nice description of the value of family.
Snowfall
LuvShortee1
Posted 7 months ago

i love the black and white picture , it really sets the mood for your ficlet
your great keep writing!!!
mecca
Snowfall
YodaOnCrack
Posted 7 months ago

Really damn good! And nice picture too… Formatted well too for an easy read. Great work!
Snowfall
Living In Wonder Land ♠
Posted 5 months ago

Really good. The details and that world created unfolds to the reader with each word.
5stars
Snowfall
White Hat
Posted 5 months ago

Vaguely heading in the direction of Accelerando-style civilization.
Maybe cyberpunk is getting outdated.
Techpunk? Infopunk? Need something catchy.
Snowfall
Capital "W" Writer (LoA's Geekus Awesomeus)
Posted 3 months ago

Wow. Just seriously wow. It always amazes me what people can pack into a mere 1,024 characters. A great read.
Snowfall
Capital "W" Writer (LoA's Geekus Awesomeus)
Posted 3 months ago

And, before I forget, I just love the term “psyked”. I don’t think I’ve seen that one before. I may have to borrow that the next time I write a ficlet with telepaths in it.