Rising From Ruins

by uselessness

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We were an overconfident card shark, carelessly casting our coins. Our faith in our fathers had failed us the fight, and the Pillager now purloins.

Weeping and wailing we went, fissured features on faces of dust, as dozens of dolls, diseased and disjointed, assaulting a swarm of disgust.

And how could we hope to have heavenly help in a battle we brought to ourselves? Surely the shrieking of soldiers assured that our sheathes should have stayed on the shelves.

Once, we were warriors coursed with conviction who carefully counted the cost. Alas, we’ve become but a burrowing badger, and lo, we’re alarmed that we’ve lost?

We’ll pick up the pieces of homes and our hearts and heavily hasten to heal, but know that we’ll never renew to the fullness or fineness of our former zeal.

When the day of our doom has departed, don’t delay till it dawns once again! For our foe will not faint before future affronts, but we’ll wait, and we’ll wonder, and win.

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Comments

Average Reader Rating: 5.0 stars out of 5

  1. Rising From Ruins

    Saint Chuck's Buddy Icon Saint Chuck

    Posted 9 months ago

    Great work, just the right combination of words.

  2. Rising From Ruins

    Tad Winslow's Buddy Icon Tad Winslow

    Posted 9 months ago

    Nice flow. It’s a battle cry that tells a story, alliterates, and rhymes, whew! what great work.

  3. Rising From Ruins

    uselessness' Buddy Icon uselessness

    Posted 9 months ago

    Wow, it seems this is a featured ficlet! I’m honored!

  4. Rising From Ruins

    Fyora Cartagan's Buddy Icon Fyora Cartagan

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    That is absolutely amazing, awesome, and awe-inspiring.
    Beautiful, even.

  5. Rising From Ruins

    Batak Beatrix's Buddy Icon Batak Beatrix

    Posted 9 months ago

    What an excellently erudite entry!

  6. Rising From Ruins

    [pens&feathers]'s Buddy Icon [pens&feathers]

    Posted 9 months ago

    This is really incredible! Fabulous job!

  7. Rising From Ruins

    Blossom Ruoqen's Buddy Icon Blossom Ruoqen

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    This is terrific. I’m in love…..
    ‘nough said

  8. Rising From Ruins

    Heygabe's Buddy Icon Heygabe

    Posted 9 months ago

    3.0 out of 5 stars

    Too Much Alliteration.
    Very distracting.

  9. Rising From Ruins

    uselessness' Buddy Icon uselessness

    Posted 9 months ago

    Hi Heygabe, if you look you’ll see that was the directive in the challenge (see the prequel). I was supposed to have too much alliteration. Thanks for the comment! :-)
    LoA

  10. Rising From Ruins

    JMBauhaus' Buddy Icon JMBauhaus

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    That’s awesome. I started out just skimming it, but then the rhyme and meter pulled me in, and I had to go back and read it out loud. That sort of thing takes a lot of talent. Great job!

  11. Rising From Ruins

    Storykeeper of Fae's Buddy Icon Storykeeper of Fae

    Posted 9 months ago

    My God. The rhythm and alliteration. A masterwork…MAGNUM OPUS ! I adore it.

  12. Rising From Ruins

    Blusparrow's Buddy Icon Blusparrow

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    I LOVE IT !!!
    I LOVE THE ENDING EXSPECIALY !
    For our foe will not faint before future affronts, but we’ll wait, and we’ll wonder, and win.
    looooooovvvveeeeeeeee it!

  13. Rising From Ruins

    Sailor Emo's Buddy Icon Sailor Emo

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    wow
    and congrats on being featured!

  14. Rising From Ruins

    THX 0477's Buddy Icon THX 0477

    Posted 9 months ago

    Lovely and challenging.
    LoA

  15. Rising From Ruins

    Dr. Mousse's Buddy Icon Dr. Mousse

    Posted 9 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    very good. the rhyming really drew me into the story
    LoA

  16. Rising From Ruins

    Saint Chuck's Buddy Icon Saint Chuck

    Posted 9 months ago

    It reminds me a bit of the song ‘Wolves in Wolves Clothing’.

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