The Sun and the Universe

by Cat the Dancing Mouse

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I said I’d never learn to love you,
You said that I’m a fast learner.
I said that I would never give in,
You said maybe you could change my mind.

You told me to pretend that I was the Moonlight,
You told me to pretend that I was the Sun.
You told me to pretend that you were the Universe,
And to let our problems vanish, one by one.

You told me that the Sun needs the Universe,
You told me that the Universe needs the Sun.
I told you that you were talking circles,
You told me that you were almost done.

You told me everything would be dark without the Sun,
You told me without Universe, the Solar System would float apart.
You told me that one needs the other,
And you promised not to break my Heart.

I said I’d never learn to love You,
I said we weren’t meant to be,
I said that we were far too different,
And maybe that was a lie.

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Comments

Average Reader Rating: 5.0 stars out of 5

  1. The Sun and the Universe

    Cat the Dancing Mouse's Buddy Icon Cat the Dancing Mouse

    Posted 6 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Enjoy:
    I wrote this poem a long time ago for a boy…Though it’s supposed to be a boy speaking to a girl. It was sort of my fantasy of what he would say to me. Of course, I is myself. And you is him. This is probably the best poem I’ve written. Please rate and comment…Or even send a note! Thank you….Cat the Dancing Mouse

  2. The Sun and the Universe

    Etsuko Sohma's Buddy Icon Etsuko Sohma

    Posted 6 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    This is a really great poem~ I wouldn’t ever dream of writing something like this, especially to a boy!! u make me bring bak good memories sigh =) 5 stars!!!!!

  3. The Sun and the Universe

    emma jo_234's Buddy Icon emma jo_234

    Posted 6 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Aww…that’s so awesome! I love it! It’s pretty but not sappy, it’s light but not happy-go-lucky. I really, really like this. oh and great title.

  4. The Sun and the Universe

    Living In Wonder Land ♠'s Buddy Icon Living In Wonder Land ♠

    Posted 6 months ago

    I love this poem. It brings back some memories for me.
    5stars

  5. The Sun and the Universe

    Mistress Elsha Hawk's Buddy Icon Mistress Elsha Hawk

    Posted 6 months ago

    But maybe that’s just me….

    My attempt at a rhyming last line :)
    Perhaps that would be too many characters? :)

    Great poem! Easy to read, Easy to follow, and Great metaphors. I like the persistence you want from the boy. Because you want him to want you and to fight for you confidently against anything you say against your own relationship. To prove the existence of his feelings for you. Marvelous!

  6. The Sun and the Universe

    Cat the Dancing Mouse's Buddy Icon Cat the Dancing Mouse

    Posted 6 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Oooo I like it. But maybe that’s just me…
    Hmm…I would use it…But you made it up. Lol. And I kind of like how the last one doesn’t rhyme…Perhaps write a sequel?
    Thanks everyone for the comments :)

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