Ficlets

DNA Designs

“DNA Designs,” John announced as the door opened.

“I want my money back!”

The customer was a frazzled woman in a tan coat. The boy at her side wore a miniature navy suit with cuff links. His nose was running.

“Did you buy a warranty?” asked John.

“Your best.”

The woman held out an electronic notepad. John hooked it to the system.

“One healthy achiever Build-a-Son…” he read. “Immunity genes spliced in and switched on… EQ activated through mild OCD … Looks good to me.”

“But it’s all gone wrong!”

“Where’s your proof?”

“Look at him. He’s always got a cold. I’ve got a note from his doctor…”

John leaned forward. “You ever heard of the hygiene hypothesis?”

“Hyge—what’s that?”

“It’s a germ theory, says when parents keep the house too clean, kids get sick. How do you know that’s not the problem, instead of his genes?”

“That’s ludicrous–”

“Can’t prove it, can you?” John returned the electronic notepad. “You’ve got to rule out environmental factors. No proof, no refund.”

Average Reader Rating:

DNA Designs
Nick
Posted about 1 year ago

And sadly, this is how customer service is these days. :)

But it is nice to see someone mention the hygiene hypothesis in a story. It doesn’t seem to get around too much for a theory that does make sense.
DNA Designs
Rachel Swirsky
Posted about 1 year ago

Thanks for the commnents!

Ever since I learned the hygeine hypothesis, I’ve been wincing at all those TV commercials for Special Cleaning Product X urging mothers (they always seem to feature women, don’t they?) to eradicate every last grain of dirt from their homes…
DNA Designs
StrugglingWriter
Posted about 1 year ago

You can never trust those guarantees! I enjoyed this one.
DNA Designs
Rose
Posted about 1 year ago

Oh yeah, those cleaning ads make me wince. Great story!

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DNA Designs