Black Cat, Big Black Cat

by Blusparrow

We stood in front of a shack.
Me: What is this?
Dakota: My shack
Me: This is yours?
Dakota: Ya, I found it abandoned and made it my own.
He unlocked the door and opened it. I heard a something get up and Dakota turned on the lights. It was a panther! I screamed.
Dakota: Calm down. It is just Jazz, my pet.
Me: He is a panther!
Dakota: He is my partner. Jazz, here boy.
Jazz came, wagging a tail like a dog. He looked at me and came towards me. He nudged against me, pushing me into Dakota.
Me: What is he doing?!
Dakota: He is just getting to know you. He likes you. Good boy.
Dakota patted Jazz’s head. Jazz walked away and I finally had a look at the place.
Me: Wow.

Comments

Average Reader Rating: 5.0 stars out of 5

  1. Black Cat, Big Black Cat

    THX 0477's Buddy Icon THX 0477

    Posted 8 months ago

    Very strange. You might want to throw in a contraction or two, maybe even an abbreviated or slang word. It helps liven up the dialog and make it feel more real.
    LoA

  2. Black Cat, Big Black Cat

    Blusparrow's Buddy Icon Blusparrow

    Posted 8 months ago

    thanks THX !!!
    LoA

  3. Black Cat, Big Black Cat

    Freedom's Buddy Icon Freedom

    Posted 8 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    wow is all i can say
    LoA :) Freedom

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