Ficlets

Edmund Extracts the Bank Manager

When a loved one disappears, there is only one person to call. Well, maybe more than one (but Edmund the Extractor is certainly a decent option, if you have the money).

Edmund discovered the robbery through his pirated police scanner. He quickly offered his services to the highest bidder. The mission: extract the bank manager.

Police were handicapped by scruples. Edmund had no such impediment. What he did have was an interesting idea. He pulled a smoke grenade from his utility belt, pulled the pin, and sent it through the drive-thru tube. Once inside the bank, he picked off three assailants with his trick dye pack launcher.

The final assailant stepped forward, gun in hand. “Drop your ludicrous weapon or the bank manager gets it.”

“Okay, you win.” Edmund set his weapon down.

“Hands behind your head.”

Edmund smiled, and pressed ‘fire’ on his hidden neck remote, his final fail safe. The launcher fired a dye pack. Surprised and covered in paint, the assailant fell to the ground.

Another job well done.

Comments

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Edmund Extracts the Bank Manager
Capital "W" Writer (LoA's Geekus Awesomeus)
Posted 6 months ago

“Drop your ludicrous weapon or the bank manager gets it.”
I love that line. I think I’d like to see more of Edmund. Does he have a full slated of non-lethal Bond-ian weaponry? Must know more!
Edmund Extracts the Bank Manager
Apostrophe
Posted 6 months ago

like the story. Entertaining. Almost James bond-ish. Very cool.. Definately have to keep this up. I agree with Capital W that was a good line.
Edmund Extracts the Bank Manager
THX 0477
Posted 6 months ago

It’s like an over zealous bank employee with a knack for gadgetry. Reads like a daydream of an otherwise mild-mannered bank teller.
LoA
Edmund Extracts the Bank Manager
K Tempest Bradford
Posted 6 months ago

“Drop your ludicrous weapon or the bank manager gets it.”

I love this line, too. and why don’t more police officers have neck remotes? That makes so much sense! :)
Edmund Extracts the Bank Manager
thebetweenspace
Posted 6 months ago

Oh, thanks THX . You gave me an idea.
Edmund Extracts the Bank Manager
Stovohobo
Posted 6 months ago

Love it, love it, love it. Hilarious. And I love how he sends the smoke grenade through the drive-thru.
Edmund Extracts the Bank Manager
uselessness
Posted 5 months ago

I didn’t see this until just now, because of the sequel you wrote yesterday! Reminds me of the Transporter. Ridiculously over the top and very, very cool.