A bad dream

by sfost93

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She sits alone in her room on her bed,
many things going on in her head.
She hears her momma screaming,
she see’s herself bleeding.
Daddy’s always abusing,
while she’s amusing.
The abuse he gives,
she wishes she wouldn’t live.
She wishes for death and as she prays,
that the nightmare would stop today.
She see’s bruise that won’t fade.,
along with memoires that won’t go away.
She hears footstep’s and tell’s him to go away,
it’s the police don’t be afraid.
We are here to help you out,
so if you would unlock this door now.
She walks carefuly over to the door,
and she hear’s more.
The police are yelling and there are gun shoots,
They were caught.
She runs and walks out the window onto the roof,
and off she jumps,she went poof.
She was gone,
so long.
Her momma found her,
and blamed it on her father.
She killed herself for no reason,
because it was that season.
Were she was abusing herself it was a dream,
and her daddy was never really mean

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Comments

Average Reader Rating: 4.5 stars out of 5

  1. A bad dream

    Disturbed Youth's Buddy Icon Disturbed Youth

    Posted 3 months ago

    i liiike you definitely have got a hold on dark mystery and creepiness which is a specialty among me and my friends. niiiice! :)

  2. A bad dream

    Disturbed Youth's Buddy Icon Disturbed Youth

    Posted 3 months ago

    i liiike you definitely have got a hold on dark mystery and creepiness which is a specialty among me and my friends. niiiice! :)

  3. A bad dream

    Disturbed Youth's Buddy Icon Disturbed Youth

    Posted 3 months ago

    i liiike you definitely have got a hold on dark mystery and creepiness which is a specialty among me and my friends. niiiice! :)

  4. A bad dream

    Disturbed Youth's Buddy Icon Disturbed Youth

    Posted 3 months ago

    btw scratch out the last two, my computer wasnt working.

  5. A bad dream

    Scary Thing I Aint Dead Yet's Buddy Icon Scary Thing I Aint Dead Yet

    Posted 3 months ago

    This was nice and dark some sentence would need some working on but besides that it was a nice creepy feel to it that makes it work out well

  6. A bad dream

    Lone Writer's Buddy Icon Lone Writer

    Posted 3 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Awww, so very sad. I like the end the best. It flows very well and Disturbed Youth is right. I wish I could write poems like that! All of mine are hideously sappy love poems written to a guy that dosn’t even know he id being written about. LOL
    LoA

  7. A bad dream

    `crayola.'s Buddy Icon `crayola.

    Posted 3 months ago

    wow. excellent twist at the end. such an air of mystery and darkness in your poems. very nice.

  8. A bad dream

    Ana Cristina's Buddy Icon Ana Cristina

    Posted 3 months ago

    4.0 out of 5 stars

    Good job, although you don’t need an apostrophe (‘) at the end of verbs. Only use them in contractions and to show possession with nouns and pronouns.
    OK, grammar lesson over! :)
    LoA

  9. A bad dream

    thebetweenspace's Buddy Icon thebetweenspace

    Posted 3 months ago

    4.0 out of 5 stars

    Very dark, but with a twist, a happy ending. I would say there are a few forced rhymes like with abusing and amusing, and yes a few places where apostrophes shouldn’t be.

  10. A bad dream

    Lone Writer's Buddy Icon Lone Writer

    Posted 3 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Bah to apostrophes! Bah! I say!
    Look! Apostrophes!
    ’’’’’’’’’’’’’’
    Lol, sorry. I’m done now.

  11. A bad dream

    Jayme Meiram's Buddy Icon Jayme Meiram

    Posted 3 months ago

    4.0 out of 5 stars

    i like it! very suspenseful until the end, which i like too.

  12. A bad dream

    Capital "W" Writer (LoA's Geekus Awesomeus)'s Buddy Icon Capital "W" Writer (LoA's Geekus Awesomeus)

    Posted 3 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Wow. Very powerful images. Excellent work!

  13. A bad dream

    flute faerie's Buddy Icon flute faerie

    Posted 3 months ago

    Very strong stuff. I love your poems.

  14. A bad dream

    I LOVE FRANK IERO AND WILLIAM BECKETT!!!'s Buddy Icon I LOVE FRANK IERO AND WILLIAM BECKETT!!!

    Posted 3 months ago

    Excellent!!!!!

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