Connie Chung: Devout Christians have been waiting eagerly for your return for centuries! Are you just going to turn your back on them?

Jesus: Devout religious Jews had been eagerly waiting my coming the first time for centuries too. One word.. crucifixion..

Connie Chung: You really don’t sound like you are over that..

Jesus: Of course I am over it. Came up with some great jokes about it too but Dad says they are rather morbid. Freud helped a bit with the counseling though the whole ‘in love with my mother and hate my father’ thing.. well.. maybe he wasn’t too far off the mark at the time.

Connie Chung: So.. Why an interview? Why not just go out, save people, rapture others, and heal?

Jesus: I figured the interview would be the easiest way to disseminate the information to people who are interested.

Connie Chung: So what do you want to tell people this time?