I'll Bet the Epitaph Will Be Hilarious

by Stovohobo

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The door slid open and the family of five stepped out, smiling and fresh-faced. Too fresh-faced, actually, more like fake.

“All right, Mrs. Watkins, if you could step in now, we can complete your operation,” said the doctor, smiling with plastic teeth at the elderly woman.

“No,” she said in slight disgust, as if unbelieving her family had even done it.

“No? But Mom, that means we’re going to outlive you and – ” cried the mother of the family.

“No,” Grandma Watkins repeated.

“Mrs. Watkins, please reconsider,” pleaded the doctor. “The door to a longer life is right there.”

“Listen, I’ll kill myself right now just to save myself the trouble of repeating myself. No.”

The family looked bewildered at this response. Who wouldn’t want to live another hundred years?

“Mom, please. It’s only a little – “

“Disgusting,” Grandma finished. “That’s not gaining life, that’s throwing it away. I’m going to stay nice and natural. Eighty-three is old enough for me.”

The doctor sighed and showed them out.

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Comments

Average Reader Rating: 5.0 stars out of 5

  1. I'll Bet the Epitaph Will Be Hilarious

    J.B. Williams' Buddy Icon J.B. Williams

    Posted 4 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    I like this story a lot. I always considered death as vital to life as being born itself. It’s the ultimate balance that we can encounter.

  2. I'll Bet the Epitaph Will Be Hilarious

    THX 0477's Buddy Icon THX 0477

    Posted 4 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Bizarre and hints at some possibility just out of the scope of the ficlet and just beyond what the old woman will tolerate. Curiouser and curiouser.
    LoA

  3. I'll Bet the Epitaph Will Be Hilarious

    Robotech_Master's Buddy Icon Robotech_Master

    Posted 4 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Interesting story. Kind of reminds me of mine at
    .
    http://ficlets.com/stories/16285

  4. I'll Bet the Epitaph Will Be Hilarious

    Storykeeper of Fae's Buddy Icon Storykeeper of Fae

    Posted 4 months ago

    Way to go Grandma! That’s what I would’ve picked.
    LoA

  5. I'll Bet the Epitaph Will Be Hilarious

    SKermitgorf's Buddy Icon SKermitgorf

    Posted 3 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    i like Grandma’s philosophy of life.
    LoA

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