Ruby Tuesday

by [pens&feathers]

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I saw her beat up car turn out of the student parking lot one morning as the rising sun dyed everything purple.

That image became burned into the back of my mind. I couldn’t see her face, for those brief seconds, only the shadow of the back of her head through the window. But somehow I knew she was wearing those ridiculous blue sunglasses, left arm hanging out the window, long hair blowing behind her.

You know, she never did say goodbye. But Ruby wasn’t the sort of girl who said goodbye.

I don’t know how it happened, to tell you the truth. I feel like these past few months have lasted for years. It’s hard for me to remember what my life was like before I met Ruby – it would have been impossible to get from who I was to who I am without her. It’s so strange, how one person can do that to you.

I stood at the edge of the parking lot, keys in my hand, staring down the empty street.

I thought about going after her, but I knew it wouldn’t change things.

And, somehow, I knew she’d be back.

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Comments

Average Reader Rating: 5.0 stars out of 5

  1. Ruby Tuesday

    SKermitgorf's Buddy Icon SKermitgorf

    Posted 6 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Loved the optomistic ending. the longing and tenderness of the narrator toward Ruby was just so clear and heatfelt.
    This is one of your best.
    LoA

  2. Ruby Tuesday

    B. Somerville's Buddy Icon B. Somerville

    Posted 6 months ago

    Think there is the beginning of a good tale but you need to cut back on the trite, cliched expressions; “picture out of my mind”, “such a whirlwind” and “car got smaller and smaller”
    Try a rewrite of the same scene but with different phrasing. Creating new image descriptions is one of the more difficult aspects of the writer’s job. All of us read more than most people and the cliches are tough to dump. 8<)

  3. Ruby Tuesday

    [pens&feathers]'s Buddy Icon [pens&feathers]

    Posted 6 months ago

    Thanks, Kermitgorf. And thank you, B. Somerville, for the constructive criticism. I appreciate that, and I’ve tried to teak some things so as not to sound so cliche. Thanks! :]

  4. Ruby Tuesday

    [pens&feathers]'s Buddy Icon [pens&feathers]

    Posted 6 months ago

    Sorry. *tweak

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