The Following Ficlet Takes Place Between 5:00 PM and 6:00 PM

by thebetweenspace

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5:07:12 PM

Sarah is in her room channel surfing. Sports. Boring. Situational Sitcoms. Boring. News. Boring. Teletubbies. Creepy.

Wait a sec. She flipped back to the news.

She couldn’t believe her eyes! A picture of a police car wrapped around a telephone pole just blocks away. Followed by footage of Jason from a surveillance camera in McDonald’s.

The anchor woman, professional and without blemish, reported, “The daring escape happened at approximately 2:07 PM this afternoon. The suspect, a local ‘tween’ named Jason Reeves is thought to be armed and dangerous.”

Sarah picked up the phone. “Edgar this is Chloe,” she said.

“How many times do I have to tell you I’m Milo?”

“Whatever. We have a problem. Jack’s been arrested and the newscast claims he escaped, but I suspect foul play. I’m sending you a still image from the surveillance footage at McDonald’s. Figure out who Jack tackled. I think it’s the key to finding Jack. And Edgar,” she said.

“What?”

“We can’t afford any mistakes.”

Prequels

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Sequels

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Comments

Average Reader Rating: 4.5 stars out of 5

  1. The Following Ficlet Takes Place Between 5:00 PM and 6:00 PM

    kaellinn18's Buddy Icon kaellinn18

    Posted 4 months ago

    3.0 out of 5 stars

    Is it just me, or did the guy’s name change from Jason to Jack? Freudian slip? Pretty interesting, except I was confused by the name change.

  2. The Following Ficlet Takes Place Between 5:00 PM and 6:00 PM

    thebetweenspace's Buddy Icon thebetweenspace

    Posted 4 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    If you read from the beginning of the series, it explains that Jason is a teenager obsessed with Jack Bauer from the TV show 24. He and his friends are role-playing, pretending they’re the characters on the show. (Hope that clears it up). ;)

  3. The Following Ficlet Takes Place Between 5:00 PM and 6:00 PM

    THX 0477's Buddy Icon THX 0477

    Posted 4 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Of course, we have to have a Chloe. Personally, I’m impressed they managed to pull any female into the game. Great job keeping them all doggedly in character.

  4. The Following Ficlet Takes Place Between 5:00 PM and 6:00 PM

    BARomero's Buddy Icon BARomero

    Posted 4 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Hmm. I was reading them as slightly younger. Tweens, or even South Park fourth-graders…

  5. The Following Ficlet Takes Place Between 5:00 PM and 6:00 PM

    thebetweenspace's Buddy Icon thebetweenspace

    Posted 4 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    I imagined them about 11-13 years old. I guess we could always make a couple tweaks in the story and cast them younger… Probably be funnier that way.

  6. The Following Ficlet Takes Place Between 5:00 PM and 6:00 PM

    BARomero's Buddy Icon BARomero

    Posted 4 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    I was working on a sequel to this, in between doing my day job, but you beat me to it again! Oh well, consider my piece a sidequel (in THX -speak)

  7. The Following Ficlet Takes Place Between 5:00 PM and 6:00 PM

    g2 (la pianista irlandesa)'s Buddy Icon g2 (la pianista irlandesa)

    Posted 27 days ago

    Favorite part, right here: ...boring,... boring,... boring,... creepy

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