Meanwhile, In The Death Star Cantina...

by thebetweenspace

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Without success, Darth Supremis tried to shake water from his tray. “Garçon.”

“Yes, mate,” Eddie Izzard replied.

“I’m not your mate, jester. I’m the Dark Lord Supremis.”

“Luke Skywalker rolls better off the tongue, dudn’t?”

“You aren’t here to give your opinion of my royal namesake. You’re here because I find you to be particularly amusing. Make no mistake, though. You can be replaced. I hear Dane Cook is the dog’s bollox right now.”

“All right, what’ll it be Lord Supremis?”

“I’ll have the tauntaun steak, medium rare with French fries.”

“We don’t serve that here. If you’re looking for fine dining it’s in corridor C-12. This is more of a cafeteria sort of thing, really.”

Darth Supremis raged, using the force to smash everything to bits, “I’M THE EMPEROR OF THE ENTIRE GALAXY AND I CAN ’T EVEN GET A TAUNTAUN STEAK IN MY OWN FREAKING CAFE! THINGS ARE GONNA CHANGE AROUND HERE , STARTING NOW !”

“Looks like somebody woke up on the wrong side of the Death Star this morning,” Eddie observed casually.

Prequels

Write a prequel

Sequels

Write a sequel

Comments

Average Reader Rating: 5.0 stars out of 5

  1. Meanwhile, In The Death Star Cantina...

    THX 0477's Buddy Icon THX 0477

    Posted 5 months ago

    Eddie Izzard? Excellent choice, particularly well channeled for that last line. And now that I think of it, Luke was kind of whiny and petulant through most of the movies, so this sort of makes sense.

  2. Meanwhile, In The Death Star Cantina...

    SKermitgorf's Buddy Icon SKermitgorf

    Posted 5 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Funny scene, love the last line, great obsurd fan fiction piece.
    LoA

  3. Meanwhile, In The Death Star Cantina...

    thebetweenspace's Buddy Icon thebetweenspace

    Posted 5 months ago

    BTW , I chose Eddie Izzard for this part because of his hilarious stand-up bit about the death star cantina.

  4. Meanwhile, In The Death Star Cantina...

    Capital "W" Writer (LoA's Geekus Awesomeus)'s Buddy Icon Capital "W" Writer (LoA's Geekus Awesomeus)

    Posted 5 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    More! More! More!
    This is really great stuff. If only I’d know what I was starting… ;)
    LoA

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