Ostentatious, Isn't It? ((Twilight Challenge))

by Overlooked_Merchandise

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She wiggled her fingers at me graciously. He had purposed to her…and the ring! It is probably the biggest engarment ring ever! That thing she called a diamond was a rock.

“Wow,” was all that came out of my mouth.

“A bit, I don’t konw, Ostentatious, isn’t it?” She said, looking at how big it was, “And it’s pretty heavy. But the man I love gave it to me and I’m happy.”

“That is the biggest ring I have ever seen.” I replied, “But I am very happy for you. You have always been a simply, sweet girl and you deserve so much, I think this man is great. Hansome, smart, caring, perfect for you.”

“He’s not perfect. He snores.” She said, still looking at the ring, when she looked up we laughed.

“Wonder how much it costed. He isn’t exactly rich,” I commented.

“Well, he isn’t anymore. But we will work that out later, I’m too happy right now.” We laughed again.

After we finished laughing we grabbed our stuff and went out for coffee, both of us smiling and lauhing

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Comments

  1. Ostentatious, Isn't It? ((Twilight Challenge))

    kells' Buddy Icon kells

    Posted 2 months ago

    Haha, too funny. I can imagine these two chatting, slipping on their ugly-but-trendy purses as they head out for a day of shopping and sipping outrageously expensive caramel macchiatos (with skim milk and sugar-free syrup, of course).

    The only critique I have is to watch your grammar. Try to avoid using ‘net slang (OMFG!) during a story, and also using so many exclamation points during narration. Maybe they’re just personal tastes of mine, but I wouldn’t recommend it for storytelling.

  2. Ostentatious, Isn't It? ((Twilight Challenge))

    Overlooked_Merchandise's Buddy Icon Overlooked_Merchandise

    Posted 2 months ago

    lol yeah…=] ((took the OMFG out if anyone was wondering where she got that from, she was right, it looked wierd))

    deffinetly sugar free! why have it any other way?!((guess that makes me a wierdo cuz i LOVE sugar…and no, i DON ”T have a problem….maybe…..=]))

    erin
    LoA

  3. Ostentatious, Isn't It? ((Twilight Challenge))

    ○○♥Promises Broken & Backs Turned♥○○'s Buddy Icon ○○♥Promises Broken & Backs Turned♥○○

    Posted 2 months ago

    God knows you love sugar. Good ficlet. But like kells said, watch your grammer. But, hey, it’s better than D.J.’s. ;)

  4. Ostentatious, Isn't It? ((Twilight Challenge))

    Overlooked_Merchandise's Buddy Icon Overlooked_Merchandise

    Posted 2 months ago

    DJ will never learn to spell right EVER ,
    i’ll bet you a dime (aka: my lifes saving)

  5. Ostentatious, Isn't It? ((Twilight Challenge))

    Sailor Emo's Buddy Icon Sailor Emo

    Posted 2 months ago

    Hehe untill it got to the part
    “He’s not perfect. He snores.”
    I thought that it was Bella talking…
    This is good! I can see this really happening.
    Thanx for entering the challange!!!

  6. Ostentatious, Isn't It? ((Twilight Challenge))

    Overlooked_Merchandise's Buddy Icon Overlooked_Merchandise

    Posted 2 months ago

    welcome, i had tons of fun. the twilight series is one of my favs and i can’t WAIT for the movie to come out on 12/12/08!!!! it’s gunna be AWESOME lol

    glad you lik it!
    erin

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