The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

by Stovohobo

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Jocks – can be followed by the suffix “strap.” Need I say more?

Skater – some can be grouped with emos (though I honestly can’t figure out how they would be able to maneuver with their sister’s pants on).

Nerds and Geeks – geeks play MMORPGs (Massively-Multiplayer-Online-Role-Playing-Games), for example. Nerds usually tend to know things, get good grades, etc. These two classes can be mistaken to be the same. (EDITED now, people. Quell your worries.)

Normal People – like the earth’s amount of freshwater, these breaks in the system account for less than 1% of the student population.

So, not too confusing? Basically, the social pyramid consists of those who conform – dumb blondes, jocks, those who wear Hollister – at the top, while non-conformists – nerds, geeks, genuine individuals – tend to stay at the bottom of the middle school ladder. An interesting side note, however, is that later in life, the non-conformists at the bottom are often receiving checks from the conformists.

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Comments

Average Reader Rating: 5.0 stars out of 5

  1. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    ○○♥Promises Broken & Backs Turned♥○○'s Buddy Icon ○○♥Promises Broken & Backs Turned♥○○

    Posted 2 months ago

    This is interesting. But really, in my opinion, “skater” is not really “emo” but it stands by itself. In my school we have I guess (for lack of a better word) skater dudes, and they are nothing like the emo people. But still. I thought the jocks=jock strap (one word? maybe….I’m a girl, don’t need to know quite yet) was hilarious.

  2. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    Stovohobo's Buddy Icon Stovohobo

    Posted 2 months ago

    Yeah, I knew many skaters were not strictly in the emo category. Just some. Enough to notice.

  3. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    thebetweenspace's Buddy Icon thebetweenspace

    Posted 2 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    I love the definition of jocks and the idea that later in life the conformists end up paying the nonconformists. Hilariously awesome guidebook.

  4. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    BARomero's Buddy Icon BARomero

    Posted 2 months ago

    4.0 out of 5 stars

    Saturday, March 24, 1984
    Shermer, IL 60062
    Dear Mr. Vernon,
    We accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong. But we think you’re crazy to make us write this essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us. In the simplest terms and the most convenient definitions. You see us as a brain, an athlete, a basket case, a princess, and a criminal. That’s the way we saw each other at 7 o’clock this morning. We were brainwashed.

  5. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    THX 0477's Buddy Icon THX 0477

    Posted 2 months ago

    nice breakfast club quote by baromero. And you’re right about the checks thing…life is much better now. :-)

  6. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    paper flowers' Buddy Icon paper flowers

    Posted 2 months ago

    I love it…especially the end. Hooray for us non- conformists! :)
    LoA

  7. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    Rae Penderweed's Buddy Icon Rae Penderweed

    Posted 2 months ago

    Oh, my deer sweet friend, you have your nerds and geeks backwards. I am quite the geek, however, thanks to the grades I got in school, am not a nerd (even though, in all reality, I’m smart enough to qualify). Star wars is geeky. Physics is nerdy. :)

  8. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    Rae Penderweed's Buddy Icon Rae Penderweed

    Posted 2 months ago

    OH! And you left out the wannabees. Thats what I was. A wanna be popular-type. Now I’m a proud geektype. Also, were I a middle school girl, I’d surely worship you for this.

  9. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    BernerOberland's Buddy Icon BernerOberland

    Posted 2 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    I’m in the 1% sweet.

  10. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    Stovohobo's Buddy Icon Stovohobo

    Posted 2 months ago

    Yeah, the nerds and geeks things are interchangeable. My point was that some people say that they are the same thing.
    Also, these are not all of the classes. (And I’m not endorsing stereotyping. This is supposed to satirical, people).

  11. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    One Time, One Chance's Buddy Icon One Time, One Chance

    Posted 2 months ago

    u forgot “dork”, the sense that is not a hair on a whale’s butt. or maybe that’s a Dudette. oh i forget. but anyway.
    and i would just like to point out in a very loud voice directed at you that i love hollister and am nothing like a dumb blonde, except for the dumb part, but there is a story behind that, and the correct term would be dipstick.
    thank you, SIR !

  12. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    Alexa ♥'s Buddy Icon Alexa ♥

    Posted about 1 month ago

    4.0 out of 5 stars

    Jocks – can be followed by the suffix “strap.”
    I almost choked on water.
    .
    You do have your nerds/geeks/dorks defined incorrectly. http://ask.yahoo.com/20060818.html has the differences.
    .
    And big props to BARomero for being nerdy enough to look up the Breakfast Club letter.
    .
    LoA

  13. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    Bigkittyproductions' Buddy Icon Bigkittyproductions

    Posted about 1 month ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Jocks – can be followed by the suffix “strap.” Need I say more? BEAUTIFUL ..
    Nerds and geeks- Completely true

  14. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    Bigkittyproductions' Buddy Icon Bigkittyproductions

    Posted about 1 month ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    What about outsiders and socs!?!? JK

  15. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    invisibility_disability's Buddy Icon invisibility_disability

    Posted about 1 month ago

    according to this, i fall mainly under the “nerd” category, and i am proud. :)

  16. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    Fantasy's Buddy Icon Fantasy

    Posted about 1 month ago

    sooo true

  17. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    Bartimaeus' Buddy Icon Bartimaeus

    Posted about 1 month ago

    Hey!! Emos do NOT wear their sister’s pants!!! But i am enjoying the story so far.

  18. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    LovingYourHeartbreak♥'s Buddy Icon LovingYourHeartbreak♥

    Posted about 1 month ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    hahahahahah love it.
    btw- what about emo girls.
    not really a big deal if they are wearing their sisters pants. :o
    and boy skinny jeans are tighter than girl ones. :P

  19. The Comprehensive (Compressed) Guide to Middle School Life, No. 2: Social Classes

    Storykeeper of Fae's Buddy Icon Storykeeper of Fae

    Posted 26 days ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Hilarious, and how very true. I loved the sister’s pants comment.
    LoA

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