Fresh Air

by Hunting Beauty

John looked at Ally and noticed a green tint to her face. He immediately pulled over. Ally practically jumped out of the car and ran over to one of the fence posts where she began vomiting. John watched Ally with concern as her body began to shake.

She took a few steps away from the fence post before her knees went out from under her and she fell to the ground. John got out and rushed over to her. “Ally, are you ok?”

“I can’t do this any more, John. How much longer are we going to have to run?” Tears began silently rolling down Ally’s face. She looked down to try to hide it but John had already seen the tears and he wrapped his arms around her in a hug.

“I don’t know, Ally, but running is a much better option compared to our other option. We’re going to be fine as long as we keep moving. I promise…everything will be fine.” Ally just sat there crying into his shoulder. She didn’t know why but there was something comforting about it. She was glad to have a friend.

Comments

Average Reader Rating: 5.0 stars out of 5

  1. Fresh Air

    THX 0477's Buddy Icon THX 0477

    Posted 2 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Great moment in the action of letting some very raw, human reaction to seep through rather than making the character amazingly stoic and fierce in the face of abnormally stressful events.

  2. Fresh Air

    thebetweenspace's Buddy Icon thebetweenspace

    Posted 2 months ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Well done for the reasons THX already mentioned. I like the emotional connection to their past as it fills in more details as to why they are on the run.

  3. Fresh Air

    Hunting Beauty's Buddy Icon Hunting Beauty

    Posted 2 months ago

    thnx guys! I tried to put myself in Ally’s shoes & write it out the way I would probably handle the situation. I’m glad it seems to have worked.

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