Ashland (Twisted Challenge)

by Laine P. Grey

Add to AIMShare

His head turned toward the noise. Ash crouched closer to the vinyl tiles. Two minutes. He smiled crookedly when Saul came into view.
“Ashland Thoms, long time, no see,” Saul chuckled lowly.
“Saul,” he nodded, his smile still intact. “Shall we dance?” They circled each other carefully, each foot placed in cautious motion.
“Ash, you’ve become a tad sloppy,” Saul admonished, and the trance was broken.
Each flung themselves at the other, hoping that the sword tip might hit its target.
Both Ash and Saul fell with a brief cut on their collarbones. Saul’s face stayed surprisingly calm, while Ash’s contorted with anger.
Here they were, master and teacher, locked in defiant gaze. The kitchen would likely be damaged beyond repair when they had finished, but it was a risk they were mutually willing to take.
“So, it continues?” Ashland breathed, pushing away his dark hair.
“Aye, it does.” Saul replied in a distinctly feminine voice.
“Savari?” Ash almost choked.
“Who else but me?” She asked with a smile.

Prequels

Write a prequel

Sequels

Write a sequel

Comments

Average Reader Rating: 3.5 stars out of 5

  1. Ashland (Twisted Challenge)

    John Perkins' Buddy Icon John Perkins

    Posted 2 months ago

    I’m not sure I see the twist here. What am I missing? Does it have something to do with “Savari” that I don’t understand?

  2. Ashland (Twisted Challenge)

    THX 0477's Buddy Icon THX 0477

    Posted 2 months ago

    Saul is really a woman? He/she’s been masquerading as a man but has also had a relationship with Ash as the woman. Or he/she is a shapeshifter, maybe.

  3. Ashland (Twisted Challenge)

    PyroPunk 51 (PPP LoA)'s Buddy Icon PyroPunk 51 (PPP LoA)

    Posted 2 months ago

    3.0 out of 5 stars

    I’m with John and THX on this one. I have no clue what the twist is supposed to mean? But well written otherwise.

  4. Ashland (Twisted Challenge)

    Ana Cristina's Buddy Icon Ana Cristina

    Posted 2 months ago

    4.0 out of 5 stars

    I think I got the twist. Nice action in this one, although the set-up to the twist is quite abrupt.

  5. Ashland (Twisted Challenge)

    Stovohobo's Buddy Icon Stovohobo

    Posted 2 months ago

    It was not your best, not your worst. I agree with the others; maybe the twist was a little abrupt, but I got it. Besides, twists are supposed to be sudden.

  6. Ashland (Twisted Challenge)

    Laine P. Grey's Buddy Icon Laine P. Grey

    Posted 2 months ago

    Yikes! Okay, I wanted it to be subtle, and somehow in your face: Savari is Saul. Savari is a woman. Past relationships have been hinted at, but not explained.

  7. Ashland (Twisted Challenge)

    XxjerseyxgirlxX's Buddy Icon XxjerseyxgirlxX

    Posted 2 months ago

    After a minute of thinking, I got it. Nice story. Were they fencing?

Want to comment on this ficlet? You need to sign in!