Ficlets

Cindy took a deep breath. “O, great and partial Lord of Time, I have one question to ask of thee.”
The omnipotent being looked confused, insofar as an omnipotent (and quite possibly omniscient) being can.
“Why are you talking like that, child? You don’t have to talk in Olden to me. I am quite hep to you young people’s lingo.”
Cindy said, “Why’re you only fourteen hundredths, then? I thought you went on forever. Ad eternum, if you will.”
The Lord of Time replied, “Indeed, my child. But people get scared of eternity, so I appear in abridged form. Now, I think you all know why we are here.”
Lionel decided to stall. “No, we don’t, actually.”
“Yes y’do! You stand accused of singing cheesy songs, dulling the intellect and stifling creativity with pop culture! Now, what do you have to say to that?”
Lionel threw his head back and roared, “YOU CAN DANCE IF YOU WANT TO ! YOU CAN LEAVE YOUR FRIENDS BEHIND ! ‘CAUSE YOUR FRIENDS DON ’T DANCE AND IF THEY DON ’T DANCE THEN THEY AIN ’T NO FRIENDS OF MINE !”
Chaos ensued.