Ficlets

.357 - The Beginning

Sergeant Cooper Alden sat alone in the office. The sun was beaming evening light through the window from its low perch in the sky.

He was studying his computer screen intently. Three killings. All male. All brutal.

I hate serials. he thought.

His concentration was interrupted by the beep of the clock, built into his picture frame. He liked that beep…it gave him a reason to look at the picture without looking like a romantic fool.

7:00.

“Shit.” he murmered. He told Emma he’d be home by seven.

He locked the computer, punched off the monitor, and stood from his desk, slinging his jacket on.

Then the phone rang.

He answered out of reflex. “Homicide. Alden.”

There was a pause, then a kid’s voice from the other side. “Cooper Alden? I’m supposed to tell you something. You should go to the warehouse at Albert and Market. Something you should see.”

“What’s your name, son?”

Click. The line went dead.

Dammit. He checked his gun and walked out the door.

Comments

Average Reader Rating:

.357 - The Beginning
thebetweenspace
Posted 2 months ago

I detect a must-read series developing here. I love the tone you’ve used in both installments and look forward to everything unfolding.
.357 - The Beginning
Stovohobo
Posted 2 months ago

So was this the original? Ergh, now I wanna know what happened in between “Remorse” and this one! But very good. Keeping with the style.
.357 - The Beginning
ALRO613 ♪ LoA ♫
Posted 2 months ago

I agree with TBS (as usual) – a series like this would be great to read.
.357 - The Beginning
John Perkins
Posted 2 months ago

It seems to me like someone really enjoyed the out-of-order challenge.
This was another well done fic. I loved the detail about the clock in the picture frame.
.357 - The Beginning
KevMullins
Posted 2 months ago

great addition, I’ll give it a 5 star when I’m back at a real pc. IPhone doesn’t like the rating system.
.357 - The Beginning
Ana Cristina
Posted 2 months ago

Yes, this takes it in quite an intriguing direction. I’m curious to read more.
.357 - The Beginning
Browncoatben
Posted 2 months ago

@John Perkins…yeah..I had a lot of fun with the out-of-order challenge. Had this idea while writing for the cop…actually outlined it so I know where the story is going, roughly.

I was hoping for a Lost type flashback feel, with sad Cooper in the present and active family man cop on the hunt cooper in the past.

I’m hoping it’ll come through more clearly in upcoming posts.
.357 - The Beginning
John Perkins
Posted 2 months ago

@Ben, I think flashbacks will be difficult to convey in this short form. Although I told your brother the same thing about multiple points of view, and he proved me wrong. I guess your family just has it out for me and my “predictions.”
I have no doubt that you’ll pull it off with aplomb and I’ll come back and say, “well shucks, guess I was wrong.”
Come to think of it, I said the same thing about the out of order challenge, and you’re the one who kicked me in the nuts on that one too. So, uh… nevermind.
.357 - The Beginning
Browncoatben
Posted 2 months ago

@John…nothing like a good literary nut-kicking to humble a fella, huh?
.357 - The Beginning
JLaughter
Posted 2 months ago

We don’t like predictions, John. I’d shake a fist at you, but it’s hard to convey properly in text. :)

Anyway, another great piece here, Ben!
.357 - The Beginning
THX 0477
Posted about 1 month ago

Nicely done, gritty and effective without being all overly dramatic and flowery…like I tend to get.