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1. Bagman: Burned Out

   Browncoatben

   Posted 3 months ago

   

   Nice piece here Jon…kind of a connector for our little netrunner to see Benny on TV. And I like that we’ve seen that finger thrown up from three view-points now. It kinda reminds me of the vantage shifts on the first season of LOST .

2. Bagman: Burned Out

   John Perkins

   Posted 3 months ago

   

   Another solid entry, though it almost feels like your writer’s block showed through in this one. Not sure why, but it just felt different from a lot of the others in this series.
   You gained your composure at the end and pulled it off with the last few paragraphs, but the first few felt like like you and Louise were both stumbling through it, if that makes sense.

3. Bagman: Burned Out

   JLaughter

   Posted 3 months ago

   Yeah, I had trouble with this one…and plus I had to go back and rewrite almost the whole first half because of some blatant, but totally unintentional ripping of some of your work on here, John. Heh, I knew it was familiar when I was writing it…just took a couple hours to sink in what I’d done.

   Either way, series is gonna keep on plugging.

4. Bagman: Burned Out

   John Perkins

   Posted 3 months ago

   

   Woo hoo! I was plagiarized. Really? That’s so cool. Not sure what you could have ripped from me that would fit here, but it sure makes me feel good that it was decent enough for you to emulate, even if it was unintentional. Now I’m curious to know what it was.

5. Bagman: Burned Out

   JLaughter

   Posted 3 months ago

   On one of your stories, you described a headache as “a 10-piece percussionist group had taken position behind his eyes” or something like that, and if my wording wasn’t exactly like that, it was damn close.

6. Bagman: Burned Out

   John Perkins

   Posted 3 months ago

   

   Ah yes. I sincerely doubt it was original to me though. I’m simply not creative enough to come up with cool shit like that. =P

7. Bagman: Burned Out

   KevMullins

   Posted 3 months ago

   

   As John said, a great continuation.

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Inspired by

• I kept close to the floor and let the air clear out. A pall of smoke still hung high, fed from the fires outside, but I could…

  A sequel to Bagman: VTOL at the Window

This story's tags

av, chip, chrome, coke, computer, cyberpunk, decker, flight, guns, ice, illegal, interactive, lobby, lowlight, metal, net, news, nirvana, one, pay, police, red, reporters, sex, shell, skyscraper, square