Ficlets | Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.

Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.

by Mighty-Joe Young

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Elsha’s thought drifted to the first time John Perkins had been killed back in aught 8 when he was just a homeless bum living outside starbucks.

Cop cars are in a stand off outside a starbucks.
“What is the situation?”
“It seems some hack writer Named Eddie-Joe Young took Kevin Lawver and some famous homeless bum named john Perkins hostage.”
“What are his demands?”
“Some stupid website ficlkes or something, was discontinued and he says if we dont turn it back on he is going to cause some carnage.”
“Is he dangerous, i dont think so, he did shoot the manager for having micheal Bolton as his ringtone, but I’d have shot him too.”
The phone rang and it was the hostage taker.” I gave you an hour and ficlets isnt up trust me this hurt me more than you can imagine but ya’ll killed him first.”
The shot gun rang out, and a lifeless bum collapsed in the starbucks.
“Kevin is next.”
Elsha snapped back to reality when she saw Jenunique, Pens and Feathers, and More Way, hidden like the camo Powerpuff Girls.

Prequels

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Sequels

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Comments

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Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
thebetweenspace
Posted 3 months ago

He did shoot the manager for having Michael Bolton as his ringtone, but I’d have shot him too. Well, I guess that makes 3 of us.
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Krulltar
Posted 3 months ago

make that 4 of us. I loved the line from Office Space when Mike Bolton is asked about Michael Bolton the singer: “no-talent ass clown became famous and started winning Grammys”
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Krulltar
Posted 3 months ago

So, do we need to go on an excavation to find the missing “h” in Jo(h)n Perkin’s name? :P
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Mighty-Joe Young
Posted 3 months ago

are you sure you read that right? krulltar it has an h, or did i use hte time machine again and change things? hahahaha
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Ana Cristina
Posted 3 months ago

Not only that, it’s not Lawyer, but Lawver.
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Mighty-Joe Young
Posted 3 months ago

@Anna dont be bitter cause John Hung You.lol
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Mistress Elsha Hawk
Posted 3 months ago

okay, camo powerpuff girls is a great image!
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Krulltar
Posted 3 months ago

I just realized something: Sarah Conrad = Apostrophe. I thought you meant Sarah Conners from The Terminater movie. Man that puts a whole differnent spin on things.
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
John Perkins
Posted 3 months ago

I agree with the Mistress. Loved the Powerpuff girls nod.
And Krulltar, I think Apostrophe/Sarah changed her nick like a week before the RabbleRouser posted the first entry in this series.
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
OrangeOreos
Posted 3 months ago

What?

We finally have a new featured ficlet?

YAY !

Congrats on featured ficlet-dom!

And the Michael Bolton line was great.
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Ana Cristina
Posted 3 months ago

Congrats on being featured, Mr. T!
And if I’m bitter, buddy, it’s because you killed me off before I even had a chance to have a dramatic death scene. But no hard feelings… :p
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
JLaughter
Posted 3 months ago

This whole series is insane. I love it.
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
BARomero
Posted 3 months ago

It’s too bad it took someone threatening Kevin with bodily harm in order for his successor to choose a new Ficlet to feature…
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Mighty-Joe Young
Posted 3 months ago

Hey BARomero i had the number one ficlet for nine days and i still have three in the most popular and the number four is the first one in a series that i an jenunique write so (mature comment) fuct you i didnt get pissed off when wonderball was the featured ficlet because i thought that story sucked, so fuct you i hate to quote tupac but fuct you too.
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
John Perkins
Posted 3 months ago

RabbleRouser, I don’t think he meant it as a dig at you, or the series, more a note on the lack of anyone “manning the ship” so to speak as far as updating the blog and featured fics.
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Jenunique
Posted 3 months ago

Congrats on the being crowned the newly featured author. (Remember what I noted you. :P) Oh, and just so you know, I have a total fascination with the Powerpuff Girls. Blossom being my absolute favorite, just for future reference. ;D
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Kevin Lawver
Posted 3 months ago

Hey guys, calm down. I still have admin rights to the web part of the site (can’t get into the backend stuff to fix things anymore, unfortunately). I made the story the featured one because I thought it was funny that we’re now talking about kidnapping people (me especially).
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Krulltar
Posted 3 months ago

Congrats TMJ on having a featured ficlet.
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Mighty-Joe Young
Posted 3 months ago

hey my daughter posted the dog to BAR i apologize she is sixteen. i just found it was featured like five minutes ago.
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
BARomero
Posted 3 months ago

John’s exactlly right. I didn’t have a problem with the story or the series. My comment was more my frustration at the lack of updates on the Ficlets splash page. The featured Ficlet was over a month old until it got changed last night (congrats BTW ), and the blog still hasn’t been updated. It’s nice that Kevin still has some admin priveleges, but someone else should be updating these sections on a more frequent basis…
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Krulltar
Posted 3 months ago

TMJ , that comment did seem out of character for you. It didn’t have any typos and you capitalized BARomero’s name and spelled it correctly. :P
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
ALRO613 ♪ LoA ♫
Posted 3 months ago

“Is he dangerous, i dont think so, he did shoot the manager for having micheal Bolton as his ringtone, but I’d have shot him too” best line EVER !!
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Lone Writer
Posted 3 months ago

OMG ! This Ficlet is seriously amazing! Congrats on being Featured!
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
RainDance
Posted 3 months ago

These ficlets are so funny. You just have to keep reading to find out who’s gonna get it next. Very very good.
And congrats on featuredom.
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
John Perkins
Posted 3 months ago

Krulltar just posted my favorite comment of ALL TIME .
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Ana Cristina
Posted 3 months ago

I agree with you, John Perkins. Krulltar is the master commenter!
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
thebetweenspace
Posted 3 months ago

Krulltar I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, your comments get better by the day! And congrats on the featured ficlet, Traf.
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
[ wall.doll ]
Posted 3 months ago

Goodness, every single thing bout this page was entertaining. This series and the comments it generates keep me in non-disolvable stitches.
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Blusparrow
Posted 3 months ago

Congrats on getting featured! Oh kevin, you did it. lol
LoA
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
PyroPunk 51 (PPP LoA)
Posted 3 months ago

TMJ Thanks for incorporating my homeless bum comment. This was really funny.
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Mighty-Joe Young
Posted 3 months ago

hey my daughter added the tupac comment could someone delet it she is a nugget head she also sequeled someones story but it was good so i am taking credit for that lol
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Mighty-Joe Young
Posted 3 months ago

hey kRaltoR ThanKs Fur rcugnizen My style.lol
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
S. Lynn
Posted 3 months ago

This is just….awesome! Beyond awesome! Well, besides kidnapping Kevin and John, nd killing john yet again! How many time is he going to die?
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Freedom :]
Posted 3 months ago

Haha, this is hilarious! I love the part about the Powerpuff girls. Great job on this.
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
SKermitgorf
Posted 2 months ago

all this killing of fellow ficleteers is acceptable but when My nephew dark did something about killing it was censored..go figure. congrats on the feature. it’s kinda funny .
Perkins Always Dies Twice or Kevin Lawver must die.
Master Em
Posted about 1 month ago

lmao!! awesome story haha