Ficlets

The Sanctity of Marriage (Diabolical Villain Challenge)

I felt the sweat trickle down my back. It was hot here in the bushes, but my anger was hotter.

Soon I saw them, the pastor and his wife, coming out to their new sauna room. They claimed they won it on a game show, but that was as false as his puritan life.

Soon the steam filled the little box and I approached, unnoticed.

I pictured my daughter’s tear streaked face as she used the psychologist’s dolls to demonstrate what that Pastor had done to her.

I slammed the door open and evicted them from the sauna at gun point, both in their swimwear. I told them to quietly enter their house.

Once inside, the Pastor tried to talk me down. “You are troubled, Caleb. God knows whatever you’re going through, and..”

“Bedroom! Now!”

“Take whatever you want! Shoot us! It’s all just things of this world.” The wife was well-schooled.

“I’m not going to give you the satisfaction of death, no. Undress, woman! On the bed!”

“What?!”

“An eye for an eye, Pastor. Your sanctity of marriage for my daughter’s virginity.”

Comments

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The Sanctity of Marriage (Diabolical Villain Challenge)
[ wall.doll ]
Posted 2 months ago

When I first started this, I thought it might have been from the mother’s POV . I just sensed some motherly-instinctive going on. But I think I like it better being the father taking revenge. All in all a tense, well-portrayed story. I’m really hating this pastor.
The Sanctity of Marriage (Diabolical Villain Challenge)
Mask By The Moon
Posted 2 months ago

hm…Who’s the villain? I only have to believe that it’s the Pastor, because the father has redeeming qualities. A reason. The challenge states that it must be fully evil. So I’m guessing it’s the pastor.
The Sanctity of Marriage (Diabolical Villain Challenge)
xxpinkislife23
Posted 2 months ago

wow that was very unexpected. I can;t wait to read your sequel.
The Sanctity of Marriage (Diabolical Villain Challenge)
Mistress Elsha Hawk
Posted 2 months ago

sequel? :)
The Sanctity of Marriage (Diabolical Villain Challenge)
Ana Cristina
Posted 2 months ago

Oh, this doesn’t need a sequel. This is powerful enough for one ficlet.
The Sanctity of Marriage (Diabolical Villain Challenge)
Mighty-Joe Young
Posted 2 months ago

oh my god elsha you have to quit hanging out with me fuct this rocks this is the shot
The Sanctity of Marriage (Diabolical Villain Challenge)
Mighty-Joe Young
Posted 2 months ago

cause i couldnt say shiaznihg
The Sanctity of Marriage (Diabolical Villain Challenge)
RainDance
Posted 2 months ago

Incredible. I like that the villain covers up his life of evil with the whole pastor facade. I liked the form of revenge, too. Nicely done.
The Sanctity of Marriage (Diabolical Villain Challenge)
RainDance
Posted 2 months ago

Incredible. I like your villain’s pastor facade. And the form of revenge; quite fitting. Nicely done.
The Sanctity of Marriage (Diabolical Villain Challenge)
ALRO613 ♪ LoA ♫
Posted 2 months ago

Very good..
I especially like the father’s name: Caleb—very fitting considering the biblical reference here: i don’t know if that was intentional…

for those unfamiliar with that story, Joshua and Caleb, sons of Moses, were told by God that they would enter the Promise Land because they had “wholeheartedly followed God.” They had full faith and belief in God that He could defeat all of their enemies once they went into the Promised Land to conquer and possess it.

Awesome story!!!
The Sanctity of Marriage (Diabolical Villain Challenge)
PyroPunk 51 (PPP LoA)
Posted 2 months ago

The pastor sounds like a hypocritical sleazebag. Very well written!
The Sanctity of Marriage (Diabolical Villain Challenge)
OrangeOreos
Posted 2 months ago

Great last sentence!

Makes you think the father’s the villain at first, but it turns out the pastor isn’t at all what he wants you to think…
The Sanctity of Marriage (Diabolical Villain Challenge)
NightMaiden
Posted 2 months ago

I gasped at the end of this ficlet. What a bum! The pastor, I mean. This is awesomely written.