Stranded on a island (Sense Challenge)

by LivExLaUGHxLoVEx

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I just got of my cruise to the secret island.
“Ok, you have 20 minutes to look around the island. Remember this is the last trip here.” Me and me best friend Jeremy walked arond together. We went over to the shell section. There was some pretty cool shells. I grabbed a few and stuck it in the bag they gave me. Then I took a quick look in the gift shop. I got out and to a sip of my soda just brought. Me and Jeremy were sitting on a bench behind the building.
“I think its close to 20 minutes, Jeremy lets go.” We walked out from behind the building and I saw the boat have way back to out town.
“Oh no! ” I said.
It was pitch black out I was walking around and tripped on a big rock. My glasses flew off. I had to feel around to find them. I finally found them and stood up. I heard Jeremy
“NICK, NICK !”
“What.” I yelled.
“Look what I found.” He ran over to me. I smelt it. I kinda smelt like a cocunut.
Using all of their senses the found food, water and survived untill help arrived….......

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Comments

  1. Stranded on a island (Sense Challenge)

    CaRoOliiNa's Buddy Icon CaRoOliiNa

    Posted 3 months ago

    Hey thanx 4 the comment ^^
    and uhm,, cool story ha =P

  2. Stranded on a island (Sense Challenge)

    kwatz's Buddy Icon kwatz

    Posted 3 months ago

    Hmm. My first attempt at a comment didn’t post.

    Essentially, you have a lot of spelling errors and grammatical mistakes. But as you say in your profile, you’re working to improve.

    I would suggest using a spell checker and then reading your sentences aloud before posting. You might catch some of the more obvious problem areas.

    In any case, thank you for participating in the challenge.

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