A Milkbone. . .where can I find a Milkbone? Surely the Guru meant this as an arduous journey, a sacred quest of which I, the Chosen One, could only fulfill. So that obviously ruled out the Petsmart down the street.

Surely that would be too easy. . . .

Unless, of course, this is a mind-oriented part of the quest. Meaning that the Guru would want me to think about what to do. So. To thinking.

Ah-ha! The Guru just wants me to think it would be too easy to just go down to the Petsmart. But I’ll outsmart him! I’ll go to that store!

. . .Unless, obviously, the Guru expected me to think this, which would make me go to the store where no Milkbone would be, therefore failing to fulfill my duty.

Wait! The Guru said I was the Chosen One. . . .Which means I should not only use my mind, but my genetic mishap! Guide me, O mishap!

Nothing. Crap. This quest was already nearly impossible before I had taken three steps.

Where, in this planet, could the Chosen One find a sacred Milkbone?