I'ma Gonna Make You an Offer You Can't Refuse

by Stovohobo

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I gulped as the old-fashioned Peugeot 404 pulled in the drive, rims gleaming. The headlights illuminated the gravel as I inevitably stepped towards the passenger-side window. The Man was a stylishly old-fashioned man, hence the car.

The window rolled down. A cloud of cigar smoke burst into my face.

“Hello,” he simply said, his voice raspy but not unlike an old-style mob boss. Probably because he was a mob boss.

“I—I have it,” I coughed.

“Good, good. Now give it to me now. Or I’ll have to use a horribly cliched quote, like ‘I’m gonna make you an offer you can’t refuse.’” He chuckled at his little joke. Problem was, I knew that was what this “offer” really was.

I gave it to him now.

He briefly inspected the contents of package, then handed it to some unknown person in the backseat. “Well, I’m glad it’s what we arranged, but there’s still the problem of your previous actions.”

“Sir—.”

“I’m sorry, really I am,” he said as his chauffeur drove off.

Then my mansion exploded.

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Comments

Average Reader Rating: 3.5 stars out of 5

  1. I'ma Gonna Make You an Offer You Can't Refuse

    T.F. Torrey's Buddy Icon T.F. Torrey

    Posted about 1 year ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    This is a compact little story, already starting something bigger. Very nice.

  2. I'ma Gonna Make You an Offer You Can't Refuse

    Stovohobo's Buddy Icon Stovohobo

    Posted about 1 year ago

    Thanks a lot!

  3. I'ma Gonna Make You an Offer You Can't Refuse

    Nouvelle Bardot's Buddy Icon Nouvelle Bardot

    Posted about 1 year ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    makes me think of a chuck palahniuk novel, right away you know the character is in peril…and you know there is a twinge of humour and sarcasm under it all.

  4. I'ma Gonna Make You an Offer You Can't Refuse

    Laine P. Grey's Buddy Icon Laine P. Grey

    Posted about 1 year ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Haha, that was one of my favourite ficlets. Bravo!

  5. I'ma Gonna Make You an Offer You Can't Refuse

    Stovohobo's Buddy Icon Stovohobo

    Posted about 1 year ago

    Thank you!

  6. I'ma Gonna Make You an Offer You Can't Refuse

    YodaOnCrack's Buddy Icon YodaOnCrack

    Posted about 1 year ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    This is incredibly good. The end was vague, but such is life with a 1024 character limitation!

  7. I'ma Gonna Make You an Offer You Can't Refuse

    Stovohobo's Buddy Icon Stovohobo

    Posted about 1 year ago

    Thank you very much for the compliment! I tried to leave room for a sequel, and apparently there was enough.

  8. I'ma Gonna Make You an Offer You Can't Refuse

    jinn's Buddy Icon jinn

    Posted about 1 year ago

    1.0 out of 5 stars

    that was really funny,,i liked it very much,,,,

  9. I'ma Gonna Make You an Offer You Can't Refuse

    Stovohobo's Buddy Icon Stovohobo

    Posted about 1 year ago

    Thanks! (Though maybe it’s just my dumb computer, you gave it one star. I’m OK with that, if you mean it, but it contradicts your comment. Thanks anyway)

  10. I'ma Gonna Make You an Offer You Can't Refuse

    YodaOnCrack's Buddy Icon YodaOnCrack

    Posted about 1 year ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    Yeah, 1 Star is a little harsh – must have been a mistake. I’ll bump my rating up to 5 to counter the effects…. : )

  11. I'ma Gonna Make You an Offer You Can't Refuse

    Stovohobo's Buddy Icon Stovohobo

    Posted about 1 year ago

    Haha, thanks buddy. ; )

  12. I'ma Gonna Make You an Offer You Can't Refuse

    Alexa ♥'s Buddy Icon Alexa ♥

    Posted about 1 year ago

    5.0 out of 5 stars

    I really liked it; has me wondering who your narrator is, what was in the package, and what he previously did to upset the mafia. Well done.

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