Noise penetrated his head from all angles. His eyes were shut but he could tell he was lying on his side, on a flat soft-ish surface of some kind. He felt like his head was going to explode.

Simon J. Patterson had been out drinking, and when he drinks he drinks to win. Rolling over in bed, he discovered a body laying next to him. A female body. A warm female body. He sighed. She wasn’t naked, which genuinely surprised him. He was naked though, painfully so.

“Hopefully this won’t be like last time!” Even thinking hurt. He swung his legs out of bed gingerly, attempted to stand and fell in to a heap on the strange floor. He looked around the floor, none of these clothes were his.

Standing took way more effort than anticipated and was only completed on the second go. Somehow, it was the standing up that woke the sleeping lady. He turned to face her as she opened her eyes. She recoiled in shock and screamed.

“Good morning to you too!” Simon looked down and that’s when he saw the blood.