I had made it to college. I passed the tests. I filled out the forms. I bought all the shit that you put in your dorm room. I put all the shit in my dorm room. I collapsed on my bed and waited for amazing things to happen.
I was going to go there and become a brand new person.
It was a hell of a delayed reaction, because here I am eating lunch with the same kid I ate lunch with in 8th grade, stewing in the same silence. He stared off at the shiny TV screen in front of him occasionally shoving a handful of food into his mouth. He never talked to me. We would just sit there. Eat silently. I’d finish first. I’d wait patiently for him.
As soon as he was done, he shuffled to the garbage. Wait in a slump for me. Slouches down the stairs, one heavy step at a time. Plodding along as if he were dragging me like some dog on a leash.
I had a death grip on the pizza slice I was holding because I couldn’t take it anymore.
I JUST COULDN ’T TAKE IT .
“F-F-Fuck you. Fuck YOU .â?