A Ridiculously Unplausible Love Story

Once upon a time, there was a wonderful, beautiful, kind, loving-oh whatever, she was just perfect, ok? A just-perfect girl. She went to school with this guy who was also perfect and she was in love with him. He was in love with her too, but he didn’t know it yet. Obviously. So they were in school together, and they were the top students (I told you they were perfect, didn’t I?) so they got to go on a special trip to…um…Montana! Yeah, Montana. SO they got on a plane and they were in first class and they each had their own personal waiter. Guy had this beautiful model-turned-flight attendant named…um…Juliet! And Girl had this horrible, ugly, smelly old man named Bert. Or Ernie. I can’t remember. Anyway, Guy was going all gaa-gaa over Juliet and Girl was fuming and trying to avoid Ernie (or Bert). Finally, Juliet and Bert (or Ernie) left Girl and Guy alone. Guy was slumped in his leather armchair, making feeble noises and drooling, while Girl steamed.