This is pretty good. I really like the lind “But it was just too dark, and you were just too blind.”

It’s beautifully written. I agree with horrorfan, that’s a great line.

amazing…

Very good portrayal of a love that never was. For a fourteen year old you have a way with juxtaposing thought yet making it poetic. Keep it up!

horrorfan and someday stole my fav line! o well. still my fav =]

wow thats great. i do agree, i love the way it was written. nice work =D

yea, i agree with cainegreene. eevryone pictures what couldve been, wouldve been. and then it never happens. very true. veryvery nice :]

this is FANTASTICCCC .
and it really reminds me of a song.
“Day late friends” by anberlin.
we couldve been lovers, but at least you’re sitll my day late friend.

Very good use of repetition for emphasis, and the imagery comparing the lover’s actions with such vivid aspects of the world was quite effective as well.

beautiful!!! This is ur finest!!

amazing…just amazing