Whew, heavy and with some additional twists and turns.

i like the repeditiveness in this, makes the flow.. flow. if tht makes sense to anybody but me. =]

eh, i dont agree. i think redundancy in so short a story is a waste. also, i feel like you ignored the ending to the previous installment and just went where you wanted with it. besides all that, though, this was good.

Awesome! Great description!

She trips over the mangled hand? - that struck me as funny and didn’t fit the serious/ scary mood - kinda lessened the creepy feel for me. But you rebounded with fantastic ability to tell the story. I think it’s great.

The hand seems like a really interesting piece—like, why it’s mangled and who Willem’s significant other. Nice use of repetition, and a great use of first-person. :)

I’ll hand it to you, very creative. You put your finger on it, you touched the essence of the story, you nailed it.