Interesting start with a good sense of just enough sci-fi thrown in as casually as you would expect the characters to treat it. The fact that it is all so run together (spacing not content) makes it a little more difficult to read, makes it feel smooshed.

Thanks. I always have a hard time fitting everything that I want to say into the alloted space. In this case I resorted to breaking it up into five parts, but I still taking up space with spaces when there was more that I wanted to say.