I didn’t mean to push the button. Well, I mean, I guess I meant to push it when I pushed it, but I didn’t mean for it to do what it did. If it even did it.

It’s just—there was this weird warning sign hanging over the button. Jerry and I were like, “Oh, no way can that be serious.” So naturally we started daring each other to push it. I mean—we never thought this would happen.

So it ended up with me pushing it. And…nothing happened. The world didn’t end or anything like that. We shrugged and went home and forgot about it.

I’ve spent the ten years since then pretty much in denial. It seems crazy, but the human birth rate dropped to nil nine months after I pressed the button. There’ve been no pregnancies at all for the last ten years; even test-tube babies haven’t worked. The world population is slowly dwindling.

I finally talked myself into coming forward, in the hope that maybe it’s not too late to do something about it—figure out what that button did and fix it.

I didn’t mean to make us extinct…