been there, done that! good descriptions!

Excellent descriptions. The second line really captured my attention and I would like to see something akin to that in the first line—more than just being awakened by the crying. Really make that first line grab your reader. (You said you desired criticism, so there it is!) The jacuzzi and sauna lines were funny. Excellent work. The last line really shows how parenting can be all about deciphering language!