“Explain this you piece of plastic shit,” I told the little bastard. I then tossed him across the room. He banked head-first into the wall behind my TiVo machine. I turned and closed the apartment door behind me, laughing outloud.

I walked over to the shelf where my TiVo was located and looked for the little gizmo, hoping to find it in pieces. Instead the toy had disappeared behind my stereo system. As I turned back toward the kitchen, I heard something moving among the speaker wires and cables. I stretched my arm out and felt behind the shelf with my right hand, poking around behind my stereo, fingers extended as far as possible. Where are you, you little bugger. I know you’re there somewhere.

“Ouch!” I screamed with agony as the tip of my index finger was pierced with a sharp sting. I quickly pulled my hand out from behind the shelf and saw only blood. The tip of my finger was missing. The damn little bastard bit me! The blood from my hand was dripping on the carpet, staining my shoes.