Three vampires walked into a bar.

It wasn’t a joke, although from where I sat, it sure felt like one.

The one in the middle was a bombshell. Tall and curvy, with fiery red locks flowing down her back and legs that most men and some women alike would kill to get between. She was also my girlfriend. Well, at least she had been, until my awakening.

Yeah, I couldn’t believe it, either. Why she picked me, I’ll never understand. I thought I was the luckiest geek in the world until she showed me her teeth.

Getting bit hurt. Dying hurt even worse. But coming back…well, I guess there’s a good reason people don’t tend to remember being born.

I earned her wrath when I turned out less appreciative of her “gift” than she’d expected. She made noises about revenge and making me suffer, but I thought it was just whacked-out nutjob talk. Besides, I didn’t think she could do much worse to me. Especially now that I was immortal and all.

Guess I didn’t give her enough credit.

My mom and kid sis flanked her on each side.