“Erlina, my dear, what ever did you think of the spring collection?” screamed Rita Stella, sliding next to the girl at the table.

Erlinda wore a pensive expression as she slowly sank her fork into the salmon mousse on the plate before her. “Well,” she said hesitantly, “it wasn’t the opposite of good.”

“Cure baldness, get big boobs, meet local men—it’s never good enough for you, is that it?” queried Rita Stella.

Erlinda pondered the question for 37 seconds, before she said yes.