I am the disintegrator. You can’t possibly understand.

I have to bite down on it; stay awake or it will all end. It doesn’t matter how I know, I just do. I am the destroyer of worlds. If I lose control, if I let go, this all ends. Every bit of it. I don’t want this, you have to understand.

I was leaking two days ago, bleeding entropy all over the place. I spilled nothing on a coffee cup I tried to pick up and I uncreated it. And I panicked, I’m so sorry I panicked, and I uncreated my dog, Silver, and three of the neighbors—both Waynes and the college girl who was subletting the apartment below mine. Christ, I never knew her name. Doesn’t matter, I guess, I guess she doesn’t have a name anymore.

I almost wanted to know if I absolutely uncreated her or if it was limited nihilism: did I only uncreate her, or did I dissolve all the memories of her? Do her parents know she existed, is she still enrolled at the university?

Never mind—I can’t deal with that now. I have to focus on not destroying the univ