Marge paused in Aisle 3, stopping her nearly empty cart and herself in front of shelves full of hair dye. The shelf directly in front of her held Ageing Men’s Grooming: Hair Touch-Ups. She reached out hesitantly to touch the green little box and then sighed.

You see, Marge is thirty-four, almost thrity-five, and has never had a husband and was currently single.

So why was she about to pick up a box of men’s grey hair cover up dye? Simply becuase the male model on the box’s front was exeedingly handsome and delicious looking, even to a thirty-four, alomst thirty-five year old, like Marge herself.

She withdrawled her slightly wrinked hand, almost agitated and decided to go look at the small selection of books. Marge got about half way over there and was then distracted by the ladies’ undergarment section.

Despite her wishes, she was almost halfway through with her life and still hadn’t gotten that boob job she desperately wanted. Quite a tragedy, right?