Greatest American Novel

“So I’m not even sure if I’m going to write half of this book, much less finish it. But, apparently, writing the Greatest American Novel is one of those “things you need to do before you die.â€? According to my mother. But look at her, she’s already starred in a Broadway play, traveled to all seven continents, been in a movie (as an extra), and published her writing. Well, it was an article for her “Has-Beens Anonymousâ€? group, as I like to call it, in the local newspaper. But whatever. She’s such an overachiever. She even bought me my own laptop for this little “project.â€? So, if anything else, I’m getting a laptop out of this. I don’t even know what to write. Well, again, at least I’m getting a laptop.â€?
And with that, I, Micheline Victoriana Blue Elsworth, closed my laptop. And sighed. At least, the writer whose pen name will be such, closed her laptop.

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